Posted by Yoke (213.84.28.202) on April 03, 2001 at 16:15:58:
what is the point of trying to help others in need? I have a feeling that I am not helping anyone. Am I helping myself by sticking to the site? Am I just coming back all the time to justify my pain to my self? Am I using this site to cope with the devil? OR AM I JUST using it because I might be lonly? Shit I might be lonely but do not need to subject you all to it! I am in atrosius pain a lot of the time! Some of you are worese off than myself and go on! Have I found a new addiction? I am cutting down on smoking. I have not succeeded yet. Why? Well let me tell you. Why should I? I do not coff. Will it help to kill the demon? I wonder!!!! Am I looking for acceptence? Have I reached a stage that I thing it is no point of trying? Am I crying for help? Ignore me if you think I am insane but tel me so. Sometimes I would like to end it all but I am fortunaate to have children and a grand child that keep me holding on.