Posted by Margi (161.184.81.207) on November 23, 2000 at 10:49:52:
In Reply to: NO Sleep posted by Dolores on November 23, 2000 at 09:54:02:
Dolores,
Have you told your hubby about this site yet? It really might help him to know he's not alone in his pain. He is probably so frustrated that he can't catch a break that he's taking it out on the ones closest to him. Please find it in your heart to forgive him. You've said before that when he's not being attacked he is a sweetheart. Please know that when he does get a "headache", he is undergoing unimaginable torture and he is bound to get bitchy.
Are you giving him his space while he's under attack? Or are you there with him trying to help? For my husband, he prefers to be left alone. He has also found that by forcing himself to stay calm, his attack isn't as bad. If he lets himself fall into the anger that the pain causes, the attack is much worse. But in order to do this, to stay calm, Mike really needs to be alone to be able to concentrate. He lays an ice bag on the back of his neck to keep himself cool which also helps in the process.
Dolores, I completely understand your frustration but please please please try to understand your husband's frustration too and forgive him.
If you need to vent, please email me at moxie_miss@hotmail.com anytime, ok? I totally understand where you're coming from. One thing I've done to combat the frustration is to get myself an hour away if I know Mike is going to be okay for a little bit while he's in cycle. Go for a walk, go for a workout. Take the kids to a movie. Just take a break. It really helps you to be able to refocus and get things back in perspective.
Compassion is a supporter's biggest weapon. And do try to get him to visit this website. It really helped Mike to learn about others with the same pain.
Hugs
Margi