Posted by Jackie M. on January 28, 1999 at 16:28:51:
Dear friends and fellow cluster h/a sufferers,
I am not afraid to ask for help or admit my anxieties here, among friends. You are so helpful and understanding, but most importantly, non-judgmental.
So I'm hoping there might be someone who can help me with the problem I now face. I've been suffering with cluster h/a's for 25 years, but had to stop working two years ago when the clusters became chronic and were complicated with fibromyalgia. I've been searching during these two years to find a part time job that wouldn't be retricted from me due to the medical problems. Finally, last week, I found a job which requires only four hours a day and no physical demands. I start Monday, and today after two weeks of no cluster attacks, I feel the signs of another round of clusters impending. I'm already feeling so demoralized and terrified, that should they start up again and become very severe, I'll lose my chance in bringing in some income. I've gone to work before, doped up on pain killers and sometimes they get me through the day, sometimes not. I just don't know what I'm going to do with a new job should these demons start up again. If I go in doped up on pain killers, will they be able to train me? Will they think I'm some sort of dope addict or drunk? Will they think I suffer from some sort of mental problem? I hope someone out there who suffers from these things to the point of being disfunctional, has some advice about how to keep a job. We desperately need the money. I have no choice.
Hope someone can help.
Thank You,
Jackie M.