Posted by Margi (161.184.81.207) on August 24, 2001 at 10:40:20:
In Reply to: Husband's Clusters posted by Mikki on August 24, 2001 at 10:24:26:
Hugs. Please don't feel guilty. I'm a supporter too (my hubby is a clusterhead) and I totally TOTALLY understand where you're coming from when you say you feel guilty. We feel like we've done something to cause this latest cycle, or that maybe we could have done something different to help him avoid it, yada yada yada.
But you know what? We are totally at the mercy of something unseen and unstoppable. And no matter how much we try to beat ourselves up about this, it's not going to change the fact that he's in cycle again, or if he becomes blessedly pain free. We've had nothing to do with it - it's just life in Clusteropolis!
Please don't ever lose sight of the fact that your hubby DOES know how hard you try to help him and, whether he is able to say it or not, he is thankful for you.
Keep up the great work, and please feel free to email me directly if you need a shoulder, or if you feel the need to yell, scream, rage at the Beast. I'm pretty much shockproof.
Oh, and visit our Family Services Group - there is a group of us that has put together some stuff to help support the supporters. You're sure not alone, Mikki, don't ever think that. OK?
Here's the link to read more about what we go through as supporters...maybe it will help you?