Posted by justin (165.247.26.97) on June 04, 2001 at 07:47:30:
he woke me at 745, it's 753 right now. all i can do is brace myself. i've taken a vicadin. i know you all hate em, but it's all i got. instead of an 1.5 hours maybe it'll only be 45 mins. hopefully. i have no oxygen because my doc's assistant is a horse's ass, and no imitrex because it doesn't work for me. although i might try it again. oh god. i can't stand what the next hour is going to bring. i'm already wincing and my eye is shut and i want to puke and die kill and scream.
maybe if i type it will take my mind off it. hey i got a question....
i just started seeing this girl and have to explain this to her because eventually i'm going to get a CH . when i'm with her. do i just show her the site. might be easiest. just not sure what she'll think when she actually sees me dance with this bastard. hopefully it won't come to that, but it might. few have seen me dance. i had an office at work to shut the door. now i'm unemployed so i'm home. and that's good. but being alone isn't always the best.
i was driving my car the other day while visiting my parents in NJ. i got a CH only a 6 or 7 maybe. bad idea to be in a car. i was definitely suicidal. nothing else matters when the beast comes. i just want it to stop. by any means. the rest of my life means shit. three times i thought if just going straight when the road curved. it would be over in a matter of seconds. and the pain would stop. fortunately i'm not insane. i made it home and had some cake. the CH was gone 15 minutes later.
alright enough of this. can't sit still. have nice day
jd