Posted by Glenda (24.88.206.7) on March 04, 2001 at 22:17:58:
A man gets on a plane and takes his seat, only to realise that the
occupant of the seat next to him is a parrot. The plane takes off
and after some minutes a stewardess approaches. "Can I get you
anything, sir?" she asks the man".
"Yes, I'll have a coffee, please, when you have a minute. Thank
you".
"And for you, sir?" she asks the parrot.
"A double whisky and coke, bitch, and make it quick, I'm thirsty!"
demands the parrot.
The stewardess returns a few minutes later with the parrot's drink,
which he snatches without a word. "Excuse me," says the man,
"but I ordered a coffee".
"Did you, sir? I'm sorry, I'll get you one straight away". By which time
the parrot has finished his drink. "Anything else for you, sir?" the
stewardess asks the parrot.
"Yeah, I want another double whisky and coke, tart. Quick, bitch, I
can't wait all night!"
Again the stewardess returns with the parrot's drink and without
the coffee. Naturally the man thinks the only way he is going to
get any service is to adopt the attitude of his fellow passenger.
"Listen here you stupid slapper," he says to the stewardess, "I want
my bloody coffee and I want it now, you cow!"
Two minutes later the stewardess returns but this time with two
enormous security guards, who proceed to manhandle the man
and the parrot to the back of the plane, open the door and eject
them from the plane.
As they hurtle uncontrollably towards earth from 6 miles up the
parrot turns to the man and says, "You're a bit of a lippy bastard
for someone who can't fly, aren't you!"