Posted by CarlD (152.163.197.194) on February 13, 2001 at 04:33:06:
Yes, it is me. The FREEk has returned. I have a slightly better system now (It actually reads JAVA, WOW!!!) So I am able to access this site once again. Yes, I know 5 or 6 of you missed me, the rest are...well, probably upping thier Prozac intake right now. Anyway, haven't read a bit of the board yet - will do that later this AM after I do my usual "I'm too damn tired to keep my eyes open and must pass out for an hour so the clusterclock can wake me back up. Oh joy!
I was down to 2 or 3 attacks a week, but now they are getting nightly again, and am beginning the multi-episode days. Not letting it get to me like it used to. I am learning new ways to distract myself from the fact that my life consists of torture sessions, eating, flatulence, playing my disintegrating guitar, fighting with the ignorant Public Aid screwover system, writing this damn book that is torturing my brains out, and searching for my future ex.
One new technique I am using to keep from playing with razorblades in the shower during a 10+ attack is this:
I sit on the floor indian style, and grab my knees, pulling myself forward - almost trying to press my forehead to the floor. While I hold that position, I am also taking deep breaths (you have to move your body slightly back and forth to do this). I can't explain what is happening, but it seems to cut off circulation while creating a pressure. A friend who watched me do it said my whole head turned beet red.
My other technique? I grab my dumbell, and do curls until I am ready to scream, and then switch arms and repeat. I think the heavy, hard breathing helps some. So far, it seems the only thing I can do because of our blessed healthcare system, and the fact that public aid keeps jerking me around on my medical card.
But I do know if I get back up to 5 - 7 attacks a day, I can go to the ER (finally have Medicare), and my Dr will authorize them to throw me in for a week of DHE-45 treatments and something else (will have to look it up. Cannot pronounce or spell it). I believe my hospitalization in August is what helped bring the attacks down to a minimum.
Anyway, I is back. Missed ya guys (and gals) - and hope to have my Author Website up soon. It will include the excerpts from "SNAPPED" that are available in scattered sections of Elaines site (Why excerpt #3 hasn;t been linked to the others, I don't know). When I have my website finally up and operational, it will contain the aforementioned excerpts, some poetry, info on the books completion date, and when a first independent run should be expected - as well as any new info as to securing a publishing deal, etc. It will act as my homepage, and will also contain excerpts of "The Vigilante Code" once that project is begun.
Hope everyone is doing okay, and like I said - when I have more time today, will read through the board. It looks like it has grown quite a bit, and might be as hard to follow as Election night coverage, but I am smarter than the average rodent.
Be Good guys, or be good at it.
Peace,
Carl D aka FREEk LaBianca