Posted by Nancy (216.236.18.221) on December 23, 2000 at 10:10:01:
Jokes For the Kids
Q: What does Santa Claus do in his garden?
A: Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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My stockings were hanging by the chimney with care,
I'd been wearing them for months and they needed the air.
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Q: Did you hear about the family who owned an English pointer and an Irish setter?
A: The dogs get together at Christmas time and have pointsetters.
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Q: If an athlete gets athlete's foot, what does an astronaut get??
A: Missile toe!
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Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes.
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Q: What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic.
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Christmas Quotes
"What I don't like about office Christmas parties is
looking for a job the next day."
--Phyllis Diller
"The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have
a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin."
--Jay Leno
Rudolph
There once was a czar in Russia whose name was Rudolph the Great. He was standing in his house one day with his wife.
He looked out the window and saw something happening. He said to his wife,"Look honey. Its raining."
She, being the stubborn type, responded,"I don't think so,dear. I think it's snowing."
But Rudolph knew better. So he said to his wife, "Let's step outside and we'll find out."
Lo and behold, they stepped outside and discovered it was in fact rain. And Rudolph turns to his wife and replies,
" I knew it was raining. Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear
All have a nice pain free holiday season,
Nancy ;-)