Posted by TerryS (198.133.22.71) on December 08, 2000 at 03:19:38:
When You Feel You Can't Go On
I'm sorry that you're hurting so desperately right now. I know how
painful the seconds, and minutes, and days can be, how long the nights are. I
understand how very hard hanging on is, and
how much courage it takes.
I ask though that you hold onto one day at a time. Just one day, and slowly
this despair will pass.
The feelings you fear you're trapped in will serve their purpose, and
then fade away. Difficult to imagine isn't it? Almost impossible to believe
when every cell in your body it seems cries out in
agony, desperately in need of comfort. When it feels like the only thing in
the whole world that
can touch your pain and banish it is beyond your grasp. And after all this
time, the assurance that
you will heal has become an empty, broken promise.
Just let one tiny cell in your body continue to believe in the promise
of healing. Just one. You can surrender every other cell to your despair.
Just that one little cell of faith that you can heal and
be whole again is enough to keep you going, is enough to lead you
through the darkness. Although it can't banish your suffering, it can sustain
you until the time comes for you to let your pain go.
And the letting go can only occur in it's own time, as much as we would like
to push the pain away forever.
Hold on. Hold on to appreciate the beauty of the earth, to feel the songs of
the birds in your heart,
to learn and to teach, to laugh a genuine laugh, to dance on the beach, to
rest peacefully, to experience contentment, to want to be no other place but
in the here and now, to trust in yourself,
and to trust your life.
Hold on because it's worth the terrible waiting. Hold on because you are
worthy. Hold on because the wisdom that will follow you out of this darkness
will be a tremendous gift. Hold on
because you have so much love and joy waiting to be experienced. Hold on
because life is precious, even though it can bring terrible losses. Hold on
because there is so much that you can't
now imagine waiting ahead on your journey...a destiny that only you can
fulfill. Hold on although your exhausted and your grasp is shaky, and you
want more than anything to let go sometimes,
hold on even though. Please hold on.
So much in life can be difficult, even impossible to understand. I know, I
know...So many of us
have cried in despair, why? why? Why? and still the answers and the
comfort failed to show. Survival can be a long and lonely road, in spite of
all those who've stumbled down the path
before you. And it can be a treacherous, torturous journey...so easy to get
lost, and yet impossible to avoid even one painful step.
And the light, the light at the end of the dark tunnel for so long
cannot be seen, although eventually you'll begin to feel its' warmth as you
move forward. And forward you must move in
order to get through the hell of remembering, of despair, of rage, of grief.
Keep looking forward please. Rest if you must, doubt your ability to survive
the journey if you have to, but never let go
of the guide ropes, although when you close your fingers around them, your
hands feel empty, they are there. Please trust me, they are there.
When you're exhausted, when all you have to count on is a weakened, weary
faith, hold on. When you think you want to die, hold on until you recognize
that it's not death you seek, but for the pain to go away. Hold on, because
this darkness will surely fade away. Hold on. Please hold on.
~Author Unknown~