Posted by Elaine (24.88.1.116) on March 01, 2000 at 13:46:44:
1. If you find a post that is over your head and has words that you
don’t understand, then do this. Reply to their post in another
language. This will immediately trigger a horrific Migraine and cause the
person to seek a dark room and lay down.
2. If you find a post with vulgar words in it, then do this. Stop cussing
the person for using vulgarity. Simply type the sweetest post you can think
of using candy-coated words. That should piss them off.
3. God forbid you come across a funny post. Close it fast. Laughter is
contagious. Quickly E-mail that person with some of the saddest stories you
can find to make them cry. Show them crying is so much better than
laughter.
4. If you find a rude post with no name, then do this. Get rude right back
and don’t post your name. Pretend that your name is
“Helloooo?????” and place that name on your post.
5. If somebody slams you or flames you on a post, do this. Tell them what a
wonderful person they are and that you are glad that they pointed out your
bad qualities to you and that it is obvious to you that they too share none
of the same bad qualities that you too obviously don’t really share
with them too; unless, of course, they too do share these same bad qualities
with you too. It will take them days to figure out what it is that you just
said.
6. And last, but not least; always remember to believe everything that you
read and to take everything that is written on this message board as a
personal attack.
I hope that everyone is having a great day and that no one shares the same
bad qualities as I do; unless, of course, you do share the same bad
qualities that I do, too.