Posted by gary g (209.187.112.59) on October 06, 1999 at 11:20:05:
In Reply to: I'm lost posted by Angela on October 06, 1999 at 04:21:23:
These are the nasty stretches Angela
the real bumpy places in the road
but we CHers develop amazing resiliency after a while
couldn't survive without it
I believe you've got more than enough already, to make lemonade out of this big stinking pile of lemons
many of us have been there
and just to rephrase one of the other posts, when someone wants to leave and doesn't have the courage and selfworth to take responsibility for doing so, they always find ways - no matter how bizarre - to put it off onto the other person
the action they take DOESN'T make their idiotic claims right, rather it usually disproves them, but enough philosophy for now
SUGGESTION:
trusting you are a CH patient (I've reread the posts from you and the walking dildo both, and don't really find that mentioned - the closest is your ref to pain, and his ref to your WWW favorites list)
one suggestion to get free of the anguish & emotional turmoil, at least for a while, is to take some constructive action about whatever the biggest REAL problem at hand is -
soounds like that's your illness
1. if you're NOT a CH patient, PLEASE take all our prayers & best wishes with you, and check out the headache links sites under the button at btm of menu at left of this screen - we truly wish you relief and good health, but if you don't have CH, this isn't the best place FOR YOU to find that, (if you need shoes, you don't go to the hardware store, no matter how nice the folks there are)
2. if you don't know if you have CH, start with the cluster quiz via button on left of screen, and also ck cluster traits & medical info buttons, ALSO be sure to get to a neurologist, no matter what you think is causing your head pain
3. if you know you have CH, then set yourself up a "task schedule" to deal with it in a disciplined manner, this will truly help you not only with the CH, but with the disarray in your life today - if this is the case, but you don't
what I mean by setting a task list, I'd be glad to discuss in detail via email - it really just means plan your work and work your plan - and right now your work is to be sure you have food, be sure you have a warm safe place to stay, do the best you can to deal with your CH, and stay in close touch with your Mom & kids.
Most of all - know you're not alone-
I had a similar experience 16 years ago - somehow the people who just have to leave, always do so at the absolute, very worst time possible, and the shock, dismay and despair they leave in their wake can seem apocalyptic
it doesn't have to be so, not at all
looking back over the years, I can STILL actually feel the pain, loss and agony of betrayal - but only for as long as I chose to dwell on it....
if I get myself back into the here and now, and pay attention to trying to find positive ways to deal with today and plan for tomorrow, then I GOTTA say -
it's all REALLY worked out for the best, and most of the time I'm having a hell of a good time !
(and BTW - my CH situation has gotten a lot better too !)