Posted by Simon (62.6.12.222) on August 23, 1999 at 08:25:51:
In Reply to: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx posted by xxxxxxxxxxx on August 23, 1999 at 05:49:29:
Anthony,
Excuse me trying to bring a little bit of rationality into this, but let me explain my questions.
First, your original posting was very precise, you had found a cure. We were naturally intrigued, but some
over-reacted. (If you read back through the message board you’ll see why, but you weren’t to know that as
a newcomer). I think they were wrong; they should have asked more, and explained their reasons for asking.
Hence my questions. I had hoped that you would give a considered response, so we could discuss that. That,
at least, would have opened a dialogue. Two reasons: one, if you had found a solution, even if it only
worked for a few, that would be a great benefit; second, if you were hurting, we could help - that’s the most
valuable part of this message board.
You said in one posting to the site that you were new to computers. Personally I think you could have
perhaps waited a little and got the tone of the site (it can be difficult, as it varies enormously), but,
correspondingly we should have given you a little leeway.
Right, where are we at?
If we are to avoid this escalating and everyone reduced to swearing at each other there are a few things we
need to do:
One we have to stop sending you hate e-mails that you say you are receiving. I think they are inexcusable.
Others may disagree, but I see no reason why you shouldn’t give us one (and only one!) example. We can
collectively apologise for that.
Two, you have to realise that questions and comments raised in answer to your posts need answering in a
civil way, and try and understand what people are saying. There are some conventions which you may have
missed, such as the “no text” postings, where the comment is in the header. (A simple way of agreeing or
disagreeing without wasting people’s time opening null messages).
Three, remember there have to some rules about standards of behaviour or writing in any civilised
community (and, by and large, this is a civilised community). These are pretty similar whether one is
conversing directly or through the internet. This is the most valuable place on the entire net for most of us. It
helps us when we are down, helps us to help others when they are, and gives us an opportunity to share
thoughts and opinions, in a way which should do us credit to anyone passing through. We cannot afford to
lose that.
I am sorry that you have been made a target, but you must realise that if those of us who are prepared to
give you a second chance are to succeed in persuading others, you must do the same for those whose
possibly intemperate and immediate reaction you found so offensive.
Chill out, read, share, enjoy, learn, help, vent .......whatever.
Third chances are rare in life, so perhaps you could now reply to my message in the spirit in which it was
meant. And please before you reply, can you read this a couple of times, and see that I am criticising both
sides.
I shall post a separate message to the whole board about hate mail.
Finally I posted some time ago about things we should all do before posting. It’s contained in a long post the
URL for which is below. Some of it is now out of date, but I stand by what I wrote, and I think you might
see that my only interest here is to help, and encourage everyone to behave like civilised adults.
Simon.