Posted by Joy on April 28, 1998 at 00:05:39:
In Reply to: Later stages of a cluster... posted by John on April 27, 1998 at 15:28:59:
John, Don't give up. I just finished a 7 week cycle myself and wondered every day if that would be the day I'd just quit. I have to agree with you about the depression. The pain in and of itself is awful but the depression that can go with it is normal. Please hang in there. And don't beat yourself up if you have to take an anti-depressant during the cycles of pain. Depression is a normal response to chronic pain. I'm not saying to get on unnecessary medication, just don't beat yourself up about it if a short-term anti-depressant like Elavil (amytriptoline) helps you better live with these awful things. We all have to do what we can to get through them the best way we know how. The more you stay in touch with 'support groups' like this one, the easier it is to deal with them because you 1) don't feel so alone, 2) have your pain and concerns validated, and 3) have exposure to a variety of treatments/testimonials from others experiencing the same thing.
Be careful of the codiene, mainly because many narcotics exacerbate the problem, but don't accept some quack who's just going to let you suffer through excruciating pain simply because can't understand why your prescribed treatments aren't working. Narcotics DO have some benefit, but need to be used with caution. I've had some headaches where I'm in so much pain, I feel I'm one step short of losing my mind. I've been hurting so badly I've absent-mindedly scratched the skin off the back of my hands until they are bleeding; I've banged my head against the bedframe in the emergency room waiting for a doctor to deliver me from a level 9, two-hour cluster that won't go away -- for the third time in a week. I know what it's like to have the fourth headache by noon, knowing that I have the rest of the day to go, each headache worse then the next, hoping they don't last longer than the one before, knowing deep down they will and wondering if the next headache is the one that will make me go crazy. You aren't alone. Hang in there; the times of remission are so much sweeter when we know what it's like to be so miserable. I don't know why God has allowed these in our lives. But I know that He has made me stronger in spite of them. Keep looking up. DJ has a wonderful site here. You've got friends who understand. Check out DJ's links. They are really helpful.