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New CH.com Forum › Cluster Headache Help and Support › Getting to Know Ya › Hola

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Hola (Read 935 times)

vrykolakas

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Hola
Jun 23^rd, 2012 at 5:45pm

Hello folks. I am new to the board (though I've been reading it for many years). Been struggling with CH's for a decade now... It runs in my family. Dad has it (has been in remission for over 15 years now, sis has it, and so do I). I am now going through a cycle. it started 2 months ago, and shows no signs of letting up. nothing I've taken in the past has worked to can the beast this time around, so the doc put me on Topamax (I guess I could use to lose a bit of weight too

) . What irks me most about this is not so much the pain that I am in.... that I can fix with my .45 solution, but seeing my wife suffer with me when I wake up 2-3 times/night crying like a little child, and she sits there by my side rubbing my shoulders.... that's what bugs me about this! sometimes I wish I could just end it all.. sometimes I sit in my living room, barely able to open my right eye, with my .45 in my hand and think how easy it would be to just end it all... but then again, I've never liked to do things the easy way. Anyways, I don't know... I guess I just needed to vent in "anonymity". Sorry if I offended anyone with my rantings... coming down from a 4 hr CH.

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Mahosian

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Re: Hola
Reply #1 - Jun 23^rd, 2012 at 6:49pm

Wow, really sounds like you're having a brutal time. I've never been quite at the juncture you seem to be at, but I definitely understand the frustration of how this affects the people I love most. Sounds like your wife is really with you on this, huh? Even though it's incredibly frustrating, I hope you can work on giving yourself a bit of a break, it's a terrible thing you're experiencing and it's not your fault. You've also found a great resource here. I don't want to talk about it too much with my loved ones because it worries them, so it's great to have other sufferers to connect with. It won't dull the pain, but it makes the whole thing much less hopeless. Wishing you good luck!

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Budbuds Mommom CH.com Junior Offline what headache? Posts: 39 Indianapolis,IN Gender:	Re: Hola Reply #2 - Jun 23^rd, 2012 at 8:56pm Don't know exactly what to say but u fixing your problem isn't going to help your wife. Seems to me she loves you a lot and wouldn't want you to do something like that. I'm here for u if u wanna talk but I can't change your mind. Valerie
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Mike NZ

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Re: Hola
Reply #3 - Jun 23^rd, 2012 at 9:16pm

Hi and welcome, do vent away, lots of us do it here where people do understand.

It sounds like you've a loving wife and supporter. Have you talked through with her about your feelings?

You said that nothing seems to work. Often when people say this they have been on low doses for medication or low flow rates for oxygen or similar. Tell us more about what you've tried, what the doses were and how they seemed to work or not work.

Are you working with a headache specialist? If so, considered trying a different one with different ideas?

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vrykolakas

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Re: Hola
Reply #4 - Jun 24^th, 2012 at 1:20am

Thank you all for taking the time to read and reply. And please accept my apologies for the nature of my post. I was coming down from a 4hr long slam, and was physically and emotionLly drained.. right now im on alprazolam 3mg/day divided throughout the day, 75mg topamax, did arally long pred taper, i take zomig rapimelt as an abortiveand sincr i am a technical diver/dive shop owner, i have a virtually unliited suppy of 100% o2 at my disposal which i use with a o2 clean scuba regulator shich supplies gas on demand, that way i dont waste my o2 with a freeflowing nonreb mask... doc told me to start on flunarizine, but ill skip it and start up on verapamil insteaf since from what ive heard flunarizine works for jack and sh.... and jack left town.

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wimsey1

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Re: Hola
Reply #5 - Jun 25^th, 2012 at 8:00am

As you've been told, stop apologizing for posting how you feel. It is a better solution than that .45. Many of us have been where you are. Pain is a remarkable depressant. My best recommendation is for you to troll this site exhaustively, take notes, jotting down everything someone has tried and whether or not it worked and in what doses, indicating if it is an abortive or a preventative. This will give you a hit list of things to try, and who knows, you might find one that works for you, too. As for the verapamil, please note many of us didn't find it worked until we were at least around 360mg/day. Also, we have better luck with the trex injections than with any of the pill forms. Begin, or continue, your quest. It will make you feel a bit more in charge of this horrid disease. blessings. lance

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