With time, we women gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. 

So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.

Beginning today Girls, when you look at your butt in the mirror, just think,

uuuuummmmm, That has to be where 'Smart Ass' came from

I like this one....