This morning on the Interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a Women in a brand new
Cadillac doing 65 mph with her face up next to her
rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner.
               
I looked away for a couple seconds... to continue shaving and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane, still working on that damn makeup.
               
As a man, I don't scare easily. But she scared me so much; I dropped my electric shaver which knocked the donut out of my other hand.
               
In all  The confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my Cell Phone away from my ear which fell into the coffee between my legs!
Splashed, and burned Big Jim and the Twins,
ruined the damn phone, soaked my trousers, and
disconnected a very important phone call.
               
                 Damn women drivers!