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Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> State Troopers R Full of Humor!
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Message started by LadyLuv on Mar 4th, 2011 at 9:55am

Title: State Troopers R Full of Humor!
Post by LadyLuv on Mar 4th, 2011 at 9:55am
These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were taken off their car videos:
1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through."

2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."

3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."   (My Favorite)

4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that will be chasing you." (LOVE IT)

6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."

11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC." ( National Crime Information Center )

13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"

14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore.. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."

15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."

                 AND THE WINNER IS....

16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here." ;D

Title: Re: State Troopers R Full of Humor!
Post by Guiseppi on Mar 5th, 2011 at 9:26am
I ALWAYS wanted to try # 16!!!! ;D

Joe

Title: Re: State Troopers R Full of Humor!
Post by Jimi on Mar 5th, 2011 at 10:04am
Love em. :)

Title: Re: State Troopers R Full of Humor!
Post by LadyLuv on Mar 7th, 2011 at 10:05am

Guiseppi wrote on Mar 5th, 2011 at 9:26am:
I ALWAYS wanted to try # 16!!!! ;D

Joe

;D ;D ;D U  R Bad Joeseppi

Title: Re: State Troopers R Full of Humor!
Post by LadyLuv on Mar 7th, 2011 at 10:06am

Jimi wrote on Mar 5th, 2011 at 10:04am:
Love em. :)



Okay Trooper JIMI.. how many did you use? ::)

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