Dear President Obama,

Thank you for helping my neighbors with their mortgage payments. You know the one's down the street who in the good times purchased their house for no money down, refinanced it several times, then bought SUV's, ATV's, RV's, a pool, a big screen plasma TV, two Wave Runners, a boat, and a Harley. I was wondering, since I am paying my mortgage and theirs, could you arrange for me to borrow the Harley now and then?

Signed:
"Concerned in USA"

P. S. They also need help with their credit cards, when do you want me to start making those payments?

P. P. S. I almost forgot - they didn't file their income tax return this year. Should I go ahead and file for them or will you be appointing them to cabinet posts?

I thought American's didn't have to pay Income Tax... just that everyone does anyways.  My friend's father quit his job at the IRS when he figured out the fine print: his job was useless and actually taking citizen's 'tax' money and giving it to the Federal Reserve, not actually helping any social services in your areas....