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        Supporter's Corner >> Supporter's Corner >> HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
        
(Message started by: clusterwife on Oct 3^rd, 2006, 10:53am)

Title: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by clusterwife on Oct 3^rd, 2006, 10:53am

Hi, I'm clusterwife, and as in my name, I'm married to a chronic clusterhead. He had TN surgery on his left side, worked well. He is depressed. I need all the help and support from you all on the board to help him the best I can. I tried to tell him he needs to get back on the meds, but he is reluctant. Thanks for listening.

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by Margi on Oct 3^rd, 2006, 11:34am

honestly, the best thing you can do for him is to get him online here at the board. It's hugely therapeutic for clusterheads to talk to others who have felt his pain.

I'm so sorry to read that a doctor talked him into that life-altering and obviously useless surgery. Wish he'd come here before he made that choice. :(

The next best thing you can do for him is educate yourself and keep up to date on all the available treatment options. You're his best advocate.

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by Linda_Howell on Oct 3^rd, 2006, 12:05pm

You might want to ask him WHY he chooses to not take any meds. Also there is 02 available that is a Godsend to a LOT of us here. Try to at least talk him into trying that.

We never close here and the door is always open..for you and for him. Try to get him to read all the links and info about everything.

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by Margi on Oct 3^rd, 2006, 12:08pm

my hubby is reluctant about the meds too.

What meds are you wanting him to get back on? Is he on an anti-depressant?

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by BlaineD on Oct 3^rd, 2006, 4:13pm

Hi clusterwife,

From first hand experience, YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE ;;D ;;D ;;D

Honestly, this site helped me SOOO much while my friend was in cycle, the support here is excellent. Everyone will give you support (because us supporters sometimes need support) and what a better place to get support than from other supporters ;;D

Definately take Margi's and Linda's advice, get him on here... My cluster head can't wait to get on here, (she's still in cycle, but is down to one attack a day ;;D).

And know that you are an incredible person. Just being there for him means the world to him, (i know from experience) although he may not tell you, he deeply appreicates him. And O2 is really helpful. The best thing you can do for him though, is just research about clusters. This site has SO much info and the internet is another awesome source.

Good luck, and we are all here for you!!!

Blaine

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by Sean_C on Oct 3^rd, 2006, 9:35pm

on 10/03/06 at 10:53:24, clusterwife wrote:

I tried to tell him he needs to get back on the meds to "prevent" them from coming, but he is reluctant.

First thing I would like to say is you must be a very loving/caring person, we are here 24/7 if you ever need someone to lean on yourself.

However, please don't take this the wrong way, if your husband refuses to help himself, he can't be helped. My guess is his biggest obstacle by the sounds of it is depression, and that should probably be squared away first. Severe depression is a very dangerous thing, and should not be taken lightly. I think if you can get him help there, hope for remmission with his clusters could soon follow with properly prescribed treatment.

Keep us posted and painfree wishes coming your way.

Sean...................................

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by ti_beach on Oct 31^st, 2006, 1:29am

[smiley=bulb2.gif] Hi! I thought I had a gr8 idea......but seems like all of them had been said!! This site is wonderful!! [smiley=gossip.gif]...so many ppl, helping each other!! I found support here! And I don't know what I would have done without it!!! Keep coming back...check out the reply threads........Listen to the ppl before me!! Hugs and Love, Robin :)

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by clusterwife on Mar 1^st, 2007, 3:14pm

Thanks ya'll! I seem to get mixed feelings when I mention surgery in any way. I have to admit, kevin got the surgery before we received this computer. It was after surgery when his mother discovered this site. I wish I could have had this info beforehand. Maybe we/he could have gotten a bigger overview as to what was in store with the "beast". All I know is that his life seems to be better, minus the depression. I hope this clears things up better. Leah.

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by daniel96 on Mar 6^th, 2007, 1:31am

yeah this site is great. as far as i know i learned alot for my CH conditions. love them all.

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by rolo65 on Jul 30^th, 2007, 10:42pm

Before I found this site I would almost every night sit here (with the computer on just wasting electricity) looking at my gun thinking of ending my pain. When I found this site it was like an awakening.

Wow there’s actually people out there that know and understand the pain and depression I’m going through.

I credit this and the suicide help links I found here for stopping me from doing it. Emotional growth through understanding is something I never got from the docs.

If you tell them your feeling suicidal, all they’ll do is call 911 on you. That kind of response was making me want to do it all the more.

All you guys (and gals) here really saved my life!

PF wishes always,

Roland.

Title: Re: HELPING HUBBY ANYWAY POSSIBLE
Post by Mosaicwench on Jul 31^st, 2007, 8:27pm

on 07/30/07 at 22:42:31, rolo65 wrote:

All you guys (and gals) here really saved my life!

PF wishes always,
Roland.

Even though I don't know you, I'm thrilled you chose life. Letting the beast have that much power in the world is not right.

I'm a supporter, not a sufferer, so I can't say I know about the actual pain. I've lived with this beast in my life for 15+ years and I'll never let it win. I'll fight it with every breath I take for as long as it takes.

We're here for you - anytime!