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        Supporter's Corner >> Supporter's Corner >> I need help from some friends
        
(Message started by: BlaineD on Sep 26^th, 2006, 7:09pm)

Title: I need help from some friends
Post by BlaineD on Sep 26^th, 2006, 7:09pm

Hi everyone,

Today I saw my CHer, she was with a friend, and she was going to school. I went over to talk to her and she said maybe all of 3 words to me, while she talked to her other friend quite a lot. Naturally, I was hurt, and I tried to tell myself what I had read so often on this website:

It's normal for your CHer to not talk to you.

But because she was talking to another friend, it hurt me, and I couldn't get it out of my mind.

Now for the bad news... After this happened my CHer texted me and said that there's a chance she might have a brain tumour. Since her cycle started on Thursday she has lost 15 pounds also. Like I said its not for sure, but there is a possiblity. I don't know what to do, I'm so scared that I'm going to lose my best friend. What should I do? :'(

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by Margi on Sep 26^th, 2006, 7:19pm

Blaine, I doubt there's a clusterhead here who hasn't thought they've had a brain tumour at some point or another in their quest for diagnosis. AND...my hubby loses about that much weight while he's in cycle, too - it's pretty common. They have so much pain they just don't have an appetite.

All you really can do is be there for her. she probably doesn't want to talk about it because she thinks she just will break down completely. By talking to folks "on the outside", she can keep her walls up around her. But with you, you know the whole deal and it just might be too emotional for her to talk to you about it in front of other people. Clusterheads are pretty private about their pain, especially the younger ones. They honestly do believe their dying or, at the very least, crazy. For some reason, they feel shame in this.

Don't forget to help her find some fun. Even if it's just giggling on the internet. You'd be amazed at how therapeutic that can be for someone in pain - the distraction and the endorphins released from laughter can be HUGE in a clusterhead's "survival" (not that this will kill her but she probably feels like it will). We supporters quite often make asses of ourselves in an attempt to make our sufferers laugh.

Hang in there, Blaine - you're doing a great job.

Hugs
Margi

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by davyp on Sep 26^th, 2006, 7:25pm

Hi Blaine,

By any chance had your friend been to see a doctor do you know as they have a terrible habbit of saying " ohhh we had best send you for a scan to make sure that there isnt anything nasty like a tumour going on in side your head" and i can tell you after my doc said that to me i was scared shitless and it was all i could think of for days.

Do you think that your friend could be acting this way because you know about her having CH and her other friend didnt. It may be that she is in denial and doesnt want to talk about or even think about CH which means that you are probably going to take the worst of it due to you knowing.
All i can say is that you need to stay strong not only for your friend but for yourself and let her know that you will be there for her when she needs you.

I wish that there was more that i could say to help you. :-[

Dape :-[

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by BlaineD on Sep 27^th, 2006, 1:41am

Hi everyone,

So I finally talked to my CHer tonight. And she told me that she really apprieciates all the e-mails and texts and what not, but that everytime I do, I remind her of it so I've decided to, back off a bit I guess.

I also finally talked to her about the possible brain tumor. Doctor Gordon Robinson did a CT and MRI of her head, and found a "small abnormality." And is sitting down with a team of experts to decifer whether or not it IS in fact a brain tumor. Results will be in on Friday. If everyone could please keep their fingers crossed, and if you are religious if you could please pray for my best friend. I would greatly apprieciate it.

Thank you everyone

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by Yorky on Sep 27^th, 2006, 2:45am

im not religeous..but il send some vibes......got my fingers crossed for friday.

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by Margi on Sep 27^th, 2006, 11:28am

I'll pray for you both, Blaine. I've met Dr. Robinson and he's fabulous. He's the doctor for many of our BC Clusterheads and he's very thorough. She's in great hands if she's his patient.

Please let us know the outcome, ok?

If she would like to check in at our Canadian site, she's more than welcome to (and so are you). We have lots of sufferers in the Vancouver area.

Hugs and prayers,
Margi

http://www.clusterheadaches.ca

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by Mrs_R on Sep 27^th, 2006, 4:16pm

Hi Blaine,

I will pray too! I was told years ago when had probs with infertility that I had a small benign tumour in my pituitary gland and this was the reason for my infertility!

In two weeks I am going in to have investigations to see what is happening in my pituitary because of the headaches - they want to know if it is still there or there is something else going on.

So I understand to some extent what you and your friend are going through. You are both in my thoughts and prayers for Friday!

take care

Liz

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by BlaineD on Sep 28^th, 2006, 5:24pm

Thank you to all of you who have been so generous as to give up a little bit of there time tomorrow, to pray or think of my friend. Tomorrow is the judgement day! We're both nervously awaiting that phone call. I will ask one more time, if everyone could pray for, or cross their fingers, or just think of my friend tomorrow, we will apprieciate it beyond belief. I will let you know the results tomorrow.

Love you all,

Blaine

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by Daddys_Devil on Sep 28^th, 2006, 8:26pm

You've got my prayers and I hope everything comes out okay. If not remeber that we're all here for you to fall back on if need be. Sometimes even a number one supporter needs someone to be there to support them. Hang tough Blaine. Message me if you need a shoulder to lean on, okay? Best wishes to your friend!

Always,
Felicia 8)

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by Linda_Howell on Sep 29^th, 2006, 12:17am

Quote:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You've got my prayers and I hope everything comes out okay. If not remeber that we're all here for you to fall back on if need be. Sometimes even a number one supporter needs someone to be there to support them. Hang tough Blaine. Message me if you need a shoulder to lean on, okay? Best wishes to your friend!

Always,
Felicia

Blaine, Felicia is under 16 yrs. old, is wise beyond her years, writes very good poetry to explain CH and she's a great supporter.

(just filling you in, here is all.) ;)

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by kayarr on Sep 29^th, 2006, 7:19am

Of course you know you have my thoughts and prayers. Hope you both are doing well.

Kimberly

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by BlaineD on Sep 29^th, 2006, 8:37pm

HEY EVERYONE ;;D ;;D ;;D ;;D ;;D

MY CHER IS FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT WAS JUST A DIALATED BLOOD VESSEL WHICH SHOWED UP ON HER MRI AND CT SCAN. SHE GOT THESE SCANS WHILE SHE WAS HAVING AN ATTACK, BUT EVERY OTHER TIME SHE GOT A CT AND MRI SHE WASN'T HAVING AN ATTACK, AND SO NOTHNG SHOWED UP!!!!! INTERESTING EH?

ANYWAYS, THANK YOU ALL SOOOO MUCH FOR THINKING OF US TODAY, WE REALLY APPREICIATE IT. (AND DON'T WORRY MY CHER IS GOING TO BE SIGNING UP FOR THE SITE, ONCE SHE HAS THE ENERGY TO DO SO!!!

LOVE YOU ALL,

BLAINE ;;D ;;D ;;D

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by Mrs_R on Sep 30^th, 2006, 3:55am

Blaine,

I am soooooooo pleased for you!!! :) That is brilliant news!!!! :)

take care

Liz

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by davyp on Sep 30^th, 2006, 6:49am

Hi Blaine,

I am so glad that it turned out ok.
cant wait to meet your CHer as she must be very special to have a friend like you, i have lost count of the number of so called friends i have lost due to CH.

If there is 1 good about CH it is the amount of support and help i have recieved from my CH family.

:) Dape :)

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by BB on Sep 30^th, 2006, 8:19am

I nearly cried reading this thread!

You are one great supporter Blaine ! My hat off to you.

Hugs to both of you and painfree wishes all round.

God bless!

Annette

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by BlaineD on Oct 7^th, 2006, 3:25pm

Hey everybody,

My CHer has finally joined the forum. Her user name is AdaN. As I told you guys... she's been an episodial sufferer since she was 10 years old. I know you all will take care of her.

Thanks a lot everyone,

Blaine

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by kayarr on Oct 7^th, 2006, 7:41pm

Good news Blaine.

Keep up the good work:)
Kimberly

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by georgej on Oct 7^th, 2006, 11:49pm

Saw that AdaN had joined, but didn't know she was your friend. We'll take good care of her--don't worry. We'll be waiting for her when she feels like introducing herself. Thanks for the heads up.

You're a great supporter, Blaine, by the way....

Best wishes,

George

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by winshots on Oct 20^th, 2006, 4:20pm

Margi, Linda, Liz, Felicia, you're the best friends anyone could ever have.
Blaine, stick around. They know. They care.

Love ya...

Title: Re: I need help from some friends
Post by cynjeep89 on Nov 2^nd, 2006, 6:50pm

Blaine,

You are a wonderful supporter and friend. I know you have been thru a lot with your CH friend but I also want you to remember to take good care of yourself and to realize what a special person you are. Wish we had more people like you on this earth.

Cyn