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        New Message Board Archives >> Jul-Sep 2003 >> How do I deal?
        
(Message started by: texasddavis on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:25am)

Title: How do I deal?
Post by texasddavis on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:25am

I'm relatively new to this issue...I've suffered for years, but just been made aware of what might be the problem and it turns out to be the "devil" as you guys call it. I work, have kids, and a demanding old fashioned spouse...so how do I deal with all this AND suffer from these kinds of headaches? No one in my household really understands the severity of my suffering.... :'(

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Roxy on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:31am

Welcome to the board...... :)

First thing you need to do is educate yourself and your family. Read everything on this site, and the OUCH site. Print off this for everyone to read:

http://www.ouch-uk.org/ch/note_colleagues_print.html

Demanding old fashioned spouses can be educated when there is a condition like ch's involved. Tell us what preventative and abortive you are on. Are you episodic or chronic?

I'm sorry you have to be here, but you will find a world of help and support here.

Tracey

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Cooked Brain on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:32am

Hi Davis,

too bad you have to be here, but good that you are...

you deal with patience and strength, by taking comfort in your loved ones AND getting and giving help on this site! If you need to rage and roar than do so, we'll be here to take the heat. This place has saved many lives...

so where are you at? have you tried any meds, seen a neuro? Let us know how you are doing.

hope you will do well...

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by jimbo on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:37am

Dave,

Have your spouse read the information on this site and try to get her educated about CH's. These damn things effect everyone in the house in one way or another. I'm sure after reading some of the things here, she'll see things from a different angle. Good luck.

Peace,

Jimbo

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by texasddavis on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:39am

Please be patient with me...I'm still feeling my way around this site and may not be in the right places...I have recently had a CT scan and am scheduled to go to a neurologist next week. I have had Imetrex, Axert, and many other meds, but none worked for me. I usually only get relief from pain meds, which makes me feel like an addict....I have suffered almost daily for the last six months....times of day are varied. But it is definitely worse when I sleep. My husband is so unsympathetic that it drives me crazy! I'm glad I found this site.

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by texasddavis on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:40am

BTW all...I'm a woman....people usually think cuz my name's Texas that I'm a man...nope...I'm all woman...

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Cooked Brain on Aug 29^th, 2003, 9:45am

dear texas,

sorry to read that about your husband... he will change his point of view if you get him to read here, believe me!

as for the neuro: print out all the medical info to the left and on this link:
http://www.headachedrugs.com/archives/preventivemeds.html

if you need (to know) anything just ask! We are here for you any time!

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by tsayswhy on Aug 29^th, 2003, 10:09am

HI TEXAS reading your post made me laugh not because i dont understand but because that is exactly what i was gonna post today HOW DO U MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND i just wrote my husband a letter the other day just because i've been dealing with this for 5 years the pain still hurts like the first one i've ever got. I think we -you and the rest of us have learned to deal with this with alittle more control so they think we cancarrie on all the same. Like u 3 kids house job and married to a old fashion dutch man ::). The devil comes every 4 hours. Last nite i sat and cried not because of the GOD FOR SANKEN PAIN but because for the first time i felt alone except for this committed site which stops me from going insane!! if you need a friend email me tsayway@hotmail.com i'm just someone that understand where u are coming from P.S I TOO AM A WOMEN ;D tari

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by KingOfPain on Aug 29^th, 2003, 10:09am

*All below suggested if you are not already doing so.*
**Also, not medical advice I am giving, just an opinion.**
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
See a Neurologist (one that specializes in CH).

Get a proper diagnosis.

Get the meds you need to battle the beast.

See/learn about oxygen (talk to Dr. for a script).

Be pro-active in your health care.

Learn/read all you can & share with all around you
(family, friends, co-workers, especially Dr.'s).

Grab an oar & start rowing.

Here's one for you:

http://filebox.vt.edu/sports/vtcrew/pictures/vt-oar.gif
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

What works for me is:
oxygen (an abortive),
imitrex (an abortive),
maxalt (an abortive),
& verapamil (a preventative).

Hope this helps.

KingOfPain

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Miklos on Aug 29^th, 2003, 10:16am

If you would like to talk with my wife to see how she handles my cycles, please send me a message for our telephone number. We live in the DFW area.

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by texasddavis on Aug 29^th, 2003, 10:44am

You guys are sooo awesome...I had no idea how uplifting it would be to hear from you all. Thanks so much. I think that this is truly doing to be a good thing for me...

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Cooked Brain on Aug 29^th, 2003, 10:58am

it's the BEST support you can possibly have!

;D

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by texasddavis on Aug 29^th, 2003, 11:09am

Someone asked if I am epsodic or chronic...I am chronic...sometimes I am truly in a depressed state over this and I read somewhere that people can get suicidal over this....I can say that I have not gotten to that point, but the depression I experience seems to be just as bad at times....The worse part is how I push my kids away during the really bad days...

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Cooked Brain on Aug 29^th, 2003, 11:16am

Hi again texas,

I think first you will get verapamil, possibly in combination with lithium and/or prednisone, do some reading on those. There is a lot of meds and one or some are very likeliy to help you get your normal life back. Just hang in there and try not to be too hard on your family.

Have you tried the imitrex injections? and what about oxygen? You really should give those a try as soon as you can!

wish you all the best in your journey to salvation and remember: it WILL get better!

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by texasddavis on Aug 29^th, 2003, 11:48am

I have tried the imitrex...it didn't work for me. I didn't know about oxygen, though. I am going to mention this to my doctor. I know that it will get better, but the question is always WHEN? How about this water thing I read about? Does that really help?

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by badfly on Aug 29^th, 2003, 12:22pm

Hi texas, welcome to the board, sorry you had to find us.

The water treatment is not garenteed to work. It has worked for some and then to varing degrees. I used it one year for about 3 months. It never stoped the cycle, just made the attacks waaay shorter and waaay less painful. NOTE: I was drinking more then 5 litres of water a day! If this interests you let me know and I will try to give you more details of my experience.

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Linda_Howell on Aug 29^th, 2003, 12:52pm

Davis,

There is a family support team here just waiting to help you and your husband in any way they can. Go below the general message board, to suporters corner.
They can help your husband to understand what this is all about and help him to help you.

LindaH

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Roxy on Aug 29^th, 2003, 1:42pm

Davis, have you taken the cluster quiz over to left? If the triptans don't work for you, but the pain meds do.....you might be suffering from some other type of headache, with some rebounds from the pain meds. What other symptoms do you have other than pain?

Trust me...I do hope, for your sake, that it is some other type.

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by CryingInPain on Aug 29^th, 2003, 4:40pm

I can understand your feelings on kids, husband, household...All those chores still need done and kids need fed and life keeps going even when you want to lie down and quit! From meeting so many ClusterHeads on this board one thing I have learned is we can handle anything coming our way!! If we can fight the beast at 3am and still come out stronger then ever in the end then we will overcome anything! As for your husband as others have said reading this site and all the information packed in here really is the first step. Cluster Headaches are very new in my household but I made my husband sit down with me when I found this board and read for hours WITH me and I didnt care how stubborn he wanted to be. Thankfully I have a husband and a great friend in the area that have taken the time to listen and care and all the WONDERFUL people on this board have made a huge difference!! So when it all seems overwhelming and you dont feel you are getting the support you need just remember we are only one mouse click away!!

Best of wishes to you!!

~Hugs~
Jen

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Charlie on Aug 29^th, 2003, 7:52pm

Sorry you had to find us but you've had some great advice. The CH letter link is the best we have to describe this horror and the effect it has on day to day existence.

It is truly an indescribable thing that has a poor name. It has nothing whatsoever to do with what any non sufferer thinks of as a headache. It should be called a syndrome. It's beyond painful.

Stick around. You'll find lots of good ideas here and ways to cope. Here is a link to a technique learned from my old neurologist. It worked very well:

http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/

Charlie

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by UnsolvedEquation on Aug 29^th, 2003, 8:08pm

Goodluck Texas...sorry you suffer too. The only way I can deal with it is one attack at a time. I still feel like there aren't many ppl that do understand the pain...except for the ppl here. I think we all understand it .
Best wishes ...
Unsolved

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by ClusterChuck on Aug 29^th, 2003, 8:32pm

Texas, I am sorry you have to be here, but I am glad you found us.

I am going to go out on a limb, by myself, from what has been posted so far.

I disagree with what the others have said about how to deal with your husband. Get a baseball bat and whack him up the side of the head! This acomplishes two important goals:

1 - You get his attention, as you ladies know, most of the time us men have our heads up our ass.

2 - You will feel GREAT getting that out of your system! It will let off lots of frustration!

Notice, I am NOT giving that advise to MY wife!

In all seriousness (sometimes I can be serious!) THIS is where you need to be. Post here to question, scream, vent, question, rage, cry, question, and whatever else you need to help you through this. We are used to it! Did I mention "question"? There is a tremendous amount of information here and it is all design especially for YOU! The more you know, the better you are equipt to win this war, and as you know, it IS a war.

The beast is a fomidable opponent, but he CAN be beat, by you. You are smarter than the beast is. You are stronger that the beast. You may find that hard to beleive, but you ARE a strong person, just by the fact that you have, and I am quoting you here, "I've suffered for years" and you have made it to this point provers how strong you are.

And now you have us. We are a far more formidable force than that bastard has ever thought of being! EVERYONE (not most, everyone) of us are pulling for you! This early in your membership of the family, you have no idea how strong a force this group is! Beleive me! I have been on the recieving end of that force, and it is AWSOME!

So stand up, get your shoulders back, (gotta get those knockers up!) and go tackle that beast! Don't let the son-of-a-bitch win!

Welcome aboard, again
Chuck

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Carl_D on Aug 30^th, 2003, 1:43am

Honestly... I don't know what to say as to how to deal with it.
I don't have a wife and kids. Never will. So that end I cannot relate to. I can only imagine the strain it puts on you in a demanding enviroment such as that.

Some of my friends who understand my situation have said time and again, "I don't know how you deal with it."
My response?
"What fucking choice do I have? It's do or die."

Still not dead,
Carl D

Title: Re: How do I deal?
Post by Linda_Howell on Aug 30^th, 2003, 2:12am

Can all of us women who, of course don't have Cluster headaches, give a hell yeah and a high five to good ol Cluster Chuck.?

Hell yeah Chuck.!!!! you rock my man!

LindaH