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New Message Board Archives >> Jul-Sep 2003 >> To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
(Message started by: Hooter on Aug 26th, 2003, 6:57pm)

Title: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Aug 26th, 2003, 6:57pm
To save Jayne's Uk thread from getting too long and to irritate Jonny (he hates this) Sorry Jonny ;D
Also sorry to the old timers who are probably fed up with cockneys too. :P

Your foreign language challenge for tonight. Please translate the following into American English or explain it and if you feel inspired as well, give me a reply in the language of the original. I will be marking your papers in the morning (Uk time)and a great big Uk prize to the best one.

(be warned: Charlie is good at this)

Dear Ch Sufferers:
Is it true that I when in cycle I should be on my Jack, stay away from the Near and Far to avoid the Tom Cruise, bang my loaf, poke my mince pies out and kick all meegrainers in the Jacksons?


Love  Wendy the Brit who is not a bit cockney really


Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Simon on Aug 26th, 2003, 7:07pm
I couldn't translate it into English English, let alone the transatlantic variety.

Is this really how they speak on Planet Eastenders?

Simon

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Aug 26th, 2003, 7:15pm
Simon, glad you didn't answer because that would be cheating as you are a Brit (bet you can answer it really ;))

Believe it or not, I have met people in London who do really talk rhyming slang! Never understood a bloody word they said mind you until about an hour later when I had worked it out.


W the B

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Linda_Howell on Aug 26th, 2003, 7:16pm
"Is it true that when in cycle, I should be on my best behavior. stay away from alcohol to avoid getting hit, bang my head, poke my eyes out, and kick all (   )    in the ass."

How did I do?

LindaH

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Aug 26th, 2003, 7:18pm
Bloody good effort but not 100% yet!

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Melissa on Aug 26th, 2003, 8:42pm
isn't it "kick all migrainers in the Johnson"?

;D

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Aug 27th, 2003, 1:35am
or the Niagara's, or the Berlin Walls! ;D Melissa

Great way of being insulting without being censored. I once called a rude poster a 'Merchant Banker' here and he replied "Actually I'm a lawyer"

Linda, there are loads of good ones for arse:


Kyber (Khyber Pass) "kick him up the khybers" sounds great doesn't it!
Jam Roll (ar..hole)
and a really obscure one
You could say 'kick him in the Ari's' or 'kick him in the Onassis' and mean kick him in the arse
Aristotle=Bottle, Bottle and Glass= Arse

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by KingOfPain on Aug 27th, 2003, 11:44am
The post:

"Dear Ch Sufferers:
Is it true that I when in cycle I should be on my Jack, stay away from the Near and Far to avoid the Tom Cruise, bang my loaf, poke my mince pies out and kick all meegrainers in the Jacksons?"

The reply (American version):

Cluster Headaches SUCK!!!




KOP

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by jonny on Aug 27th, 2003, 2:35pm
Sorry but it does not annoy me, ill just get pee pants to translate....LOL ;D

What annoys me is how damn slow the board is its only here that it is slow. oh well, gotta take some slow days in order to get the fast ones I guess.

......................................jonny :D

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by KingOfPain on Aug 27th, 2003, 2:42pm

on 08/26/03 at 18:57:25, Hooter wrote:
Dear Ch Sufferers:
Is it true that I when in cycle I should be on my Jack, stay away from the Near and Far to avoid the Tom Cruise, bang my loaf, poke my mince pies out and kick all meegrainers in the Jacksons?



My attempt:

Dear Ch Sufferers:
Is it true that (remove the "I") when in cycle, I should be on my own, stay away from the bar(pub) to avoid the (I have no idea about "Tom Cruise" meaning, maybe "trigger", "cocktail", or "drink"?), bang my head, poke my eyes out, and kick all (I don't like that "m" term/usage) migraine sufferers in the bollocks/testicles/balls?


;D


KingOfPain

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Carl_D on Aug 27th, 2003, 2:52pm
In my hood, it might be phrased as follows:

When I'm trippin on the bolts light JJ's dynomite, stuck into my G's, the fright be the foe of the dawn that I caressed with stone solemn ripple fruit to bang the walls of the mid crib.

Just a guess,
FREEk

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Bob P on Aug 27th, 2003, 3:54pm
Translation:

Donate to OUCH USA!

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Aug 27th, 2003, 8:20pm
KOP- nearly completely brilliant!(and spotted the typo as well , you bugger)

Tom Cruise was a bit of a mean one because it is 'booze' which is also English slang meaning alcohol.
The rest was spot on , including the Jackson Pollocks

I agree about meegrainers, being one myself

Carl , what are you on? Can I have some please?


Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by KingOfPain on Sep 2nd, 2003, 12:46pm

on 08/26/03 at 18:57:25, Hooter wrote:
I will be marking your papers in the morning (Uk time)and a great big Uk prize to the best one.


Love  Wendy the Brit who is not a bit cockney really



And ? ? ? ? ? ? ?  ???


Was mine "the best one" ?   ???

What is  "a great big Uk prize"   ???



Just wondering.



KingOfPain

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by KingOfPain on Sep 2nd, 2003, 12:49pm
Here it is again (slightly modified with "booze" added).


My attempt:

Dear Ch Sufferers:
Is it true that (remove the "I") when in cycle, I should be on my own, stay away from the bar(pub) to avoid the booze, bang my head, poke my eyes out, and kick all (I don't like that "m" term/usage) migraine sufferers in the bollocks/testicles/balls?



KingOfPain

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Sep 2nd, 2003, 1:06pm
Sorry KOP, I've got hideous computer problems since stupidly switching to Broadband. My connection is being dumped constantly.

Hurrah, you are spot on...

and your prize is..

if you want it, a Cocknet rhyming slang dictionary!

I'm cheating really as it is available online at www.aldertons.com , but if you pm me your address I will post you a paper copy!

Love


Wendy

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Ree on Sep 2nd, 2003, 1:15pm
my translation is that W the B is another person that hates Migrainers... do you hate people with other afflictions too.  

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Sep 2nd, 2003, 1:41pm
Ree.

Wind your neck in and stop looking for offence where there isn't any. I am a migraine sufferer as well and have regularly joined you in defending us on this board if you remember.
This was a JOKE post!

Lighten up!

W the B

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by kim on Sep 2nd, 2003, 1:46pm
Hey Hooter,

I just wanted to say.............I think I love you ;D


Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Sep 2nd, 2003, 1:51pm
How are the trotters?
I can put out cigarettes on the soles of my feet.(I aint kidding!)

Where are you when I need you Cathy?

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by kim on Sep 2nd, 2003, 7:18pm
Trotters are good*

sorry........was off topic? ;D

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Ree on Sep 2nd, 2003, 11:25pm
ya and I usually do have a good sense of humor... just that word sends me up a freaken tree... sorry I guess its the hormones and all...  ::) :o :o ;D~~~ I guess its just cuz its something thats wrong with me... and its a bone of contention on this board.  So if anyone uses that word expect my sense of humor to go awry~~ sorry again if I ruined your joke... Its just not funny when its your head that hurts no one ever jokes about ch... especially not me... ree

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Sep 3rd, 2003, 12:45am
Hey, I'm sorry too Ree. I was in a foul mood yesterday as I am having hideous Broadband problems (hence I'm not on here much at the moment as my connection is being dumped every couple of minutes) and had spent half the day waiting on call centre lines, and you know what that does to you! Shouldn't have snapped at you like that.
Wasn't a very good joke frankly anyway.
It IS  sensitive subject here for me too, so I should have left migraine out of it . I get as cross as you do about people giving migraine sufferers a hard time. Ch sufferers know that NO-ONE knows what a CH attack feels like unless you've actually had one, so unless you get migraines yourself, you can't know what those feel like either.

Sorry Ree

Love W the B

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by cathy on Sep 3rd, 2003, 1:27am

on 09/02/03 at 23:25:25, Ree wrote:
Its just not funny when its your head that hurts no one ever jokes about ch... ree


Hmmmm take it from me to joke about CH is NOT  a good idea.... ::)

Love you all, hey Kim thought you said you loved me...you hussy you.... :o

Cathy

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by CathiP on Sep 3rd, 2003, 1:36am
???NOW WAIT JUST A DOGGONE MINUTE!
Cathy said she loved ME- now she's playing up to YOU, Kim?
My feet are clean- smelling of peppermint, in fact......oh, I see...you two think you should stick together cause you can still climb trees and swing? Well, missies, let me ask THIS- who's gonna tell ya when to let GOOOO?? Hmmm?

Aww, nevermind.....Wendy's got soo much class....no cockney accent, very studied language.....a real right lady, that one.....
Oh, Wennnnndddddyyyyy.......wait for meeeee!!
:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*

Cathi, who is missing Cootie as well, cause she would be having fun with this thread, too...but I think her puter died for real this time....

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Hooter on Sep 3rd, 2003, 7:34am
Hey Cathi
That's me, real lady, don't swear, don't fart.

Trouble is, I lie!

W the B

P.S. Is it my imagination or are all the 'puters in clusterworld ganging up and causing trouble at the moment?

Title: Re: To annoy Jonny (sort of CH)
Post by Peppermint on Sep 3rd, 2003, 8:41am

on 09/03/03 at 01:36:39, CathiP wrote:
My feet are clean- smelling of peppermint, in fact......


uhhh , DG? ???
I'm not sure I like the sound of that...  :P...  



:D



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