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        New Message Board Archives >> Jan-Mar 2003 >> fallout of clusters
        
(Message started by: thatsafully on Jan 14^th, 2003, 7:54pm)

Title: fallout of clusters
Post by thatsafully on Jan 14^th, 2003, 7:54pm

I am currently going through a NASTY divorce, due in part to the hell Clusters have played with my life. I'm actually glad to be away from my wife, but the problem is that she and the courts are using my disability (chronic clusters) as a means of keeping my sons (ages 15 &14) from being allowed to visit me at all!!!!
My sons have NEVER been so much as given a smack on their asses in their entire lives, nor has there EVER been a single incident of ANYTHING which could possibly justify the courts actions. My wife and her attorney have gone so far as to march into the courtroom carrying a large bag of all my old prescription bottles, present them to the Judge, and use the fact that I've been prescribed a TON of meds over the years as a reason to keep my sons from seeing me at all. The Judge even had the nerve to look at a bottle of Depakote and say, "I know what this is for, they give this to people with mental problems!" What friggin nerve!!!!!!!!
What also has been used against my kids and I is the fact that on several occasions, while in the grips of an 11, I've made comments about how I wish I would just die already. Forgive the hell out of me for suffering from a disease that I have NO CONTROL OVER WHATSOEVER (except for Pred., which they won't keep you on anyway)
I have been screaming about this for a little over a year now and I think I'm finally getting somewhere. I'm shaking every tree out there, from the office of the President, to Senators, Congressmen, Governors and the ACLU. Today, as a matter of fact, I received a call from my Senator's office and I think that MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, I might start getting somewhere here. I'm screaming at the top of my lungs and I am starting to be heard. It is supposed to be illegal to discriminate against someone because they are disabled. This WILL bring our entire plight, not just our pain into the light of the public eye. If I can keep the pressure on every politician that I possibly can, WE CAN BE HEARD! Any suggestions or help as I continue to battle the forces of evil would be appreciated. Kids do not neccessarily have to "physically" experience Clusters to have their lives effected by them. Wish me luck - It's a fight for ALL OF US!!!!!!!

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by Margi on Jan 14^th, 2003, 9:34pm

I'm sorry to hear you're going through such a rough time, legally, because of your clusters. You might try printing out some stuff here from the website and giving it to your lawyer, so that you do get the recognition and respect you need.

I'm going to move your post up to the General Section - I think you'll get more responses there. Quite often, only supporters or parents of children with clusters read these boards (not that there's any restrictions for anyone, anywhere, here), but I think readership will be higher for you up there. I hope that's ok with you.

Best of luck to you.

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by echo on Jan 14^th, 2003, 9:47pm

Thanks for moving this one over Margi.

Well Thatsafully, this post definately got my blood pressure up. Friggen lawyers and their tactics to attempt to destroy someones live in their effort to thicken their pocket books and widen their heads. Lennon had the right idea when he cleared them from Russia.

She saved the bottles? Holy shit! Sorry but this post just plain pissed me off! I'm preaching to the choir but who the hell do they think they are pulling this on you, anyone. You have every right to see your kids, taking them away based on CH opens the courts to the opportunity to take mine away if some SOB decides to try.

Hang in there! Glad to read you aren't taking this lying down.

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by cerebus on Jan 14^th, 2003, 9:59pm

DO NOT ALLOW YOUR EX TO SUCCEED!

print out all the facts that you can from the buttons on the left, get some statements from our doctors and get your lawyer to submit them to the judge. When faced with overwhelming evidence that CH IS not dangerous to your kids the Judge if he is any good at his/her job will rule in favor of you at least on this issue.
BUT get the FACTS and make sure the judge has no option other than to take the medical facts into considderation.
I hate to get involved in this kind of thing, as it is none of my business, but , you have to fight her on this one. All to frequently the males rights are infringed upon in these matters. In order for her to succeed she has to prove that you are an unfit parent. This includes but is not limited to abuse of drugs/alcohol, physical abuse, etc. The judge cannot rule based on hearsay, the meds were prescribed ...yes, but , WHY is very relevant, unless it was to control a mental condition that possibly endangers the kids there is no reason to deny you visitation.
Good luck! DEFEND YOUR RIGHTS AS A FATHER
Cerebus

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by echo on Jan 14^th, 2003, 10:04pm

Talk to your lawyer about having your doctor called as a witness.

If she wins the first round it will be extremely difficult for you to even get the second round scheduled.

Fight this one with all your might!

I wish you the best. Kids need their father - CH sufferer or not.

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by bwags on Jan 15^th, 2003, 7:32am

along with all the advice being posted, I highly agree with the them all, My added suggestion is to also show your kids the information from this site so they have a better understanding of what it's like to have and live with an attach from a CH. At the age your sons are some states will listen to them as to which parents they wish to live with, The older they are the more weight the judge decides on their decissions and feelings. I hate X's that drive a knife between kids and parents.

Hang in there and fight like HELL!!!

bwags

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by Silver_Dolphins on Jan 15^th, 2003, 4:25pm

Sorry to hear of the troubles you're facing. The only thing I can say is what everyone else has already said. Get armed to the teeth with information, assure that your attorney is well educated about CH. Have your attorney call or mett with your doc if your doc cannot be called into court.

It sounds like her attorney is going for the aorta. You need to be ready for any attack from that camp. Also you should be ready to fight fire with nuclear weapons. Be willing to get in the sty with them.

Good luck

Silver Dolphins

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by Mark C on Jan 15^th, 2003, 8:54pm

This kind of shit is going out of style....FAST. When In first read this post I was so angry I had to calm down. I try not to reply out of anger. You have many allies, I am one of them. I am a Father, no a DADDY! We are needed. You are not the bad guy here and we are going to take this.....woman and her Goddamn lawyers on. I am in the process of doing research now to try to assist you in this
outrageous situation. I will send you information as I came to it.
Even in my divorce, which up until now was the nastiest ever, my Ex never tried this crap. Just remember, the truth will eventually come out and when the children learn the truth about their Mother.....well it will be her loss. I am sorry for this mess, I know how you feel.

http://www.dadsrights.com/
http://www.fathersrights.org/
http://www.fathers-rights-child-custody.com/
http://www.acfc.org/lkallorg.htm

http://www.mensnewsdaily.com/linklist.htm

Keep in mind, it WILL get better, don't lose faith. Your kids know you love them. God will judge.
PFDAN's
Mark

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by cootie on Jan 15^th, 2003, 10:22pm

keep up the fight thatsafully.....your kids are worth it.....sorry to hear this kinda shit goes on......am wishin you luck with your fight. Jus think of all the witness's you'd have if this board could stand up in your honer in court.......shew.....it'd be staggerin !! Pam

Title: Re: fallout of clusters
Post by catlind on Jan 16^th, 2003, 9:57am

Thatsafully,

Good Gawd, what an awful wench your wife is being!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am divorced, and I refused to involve lawyers even though my ex wanted them, because I did not want ANYTHING to cause difficulties for my children.
They need their Dad, even though they have a step father, they have a whole family that I can't even begin to imagine denying them.

Talk to your kids. They are both old enough to testify in court, see if your lawyer will call them as witnesses, inform your kids, and show them all the info on this site about clusters. I don't know how it works in the states, I'm canadian born, but they are both old enough tomake their own decisions. In Ontario, once they reach age 12, the court order can be ignored if the child chooses not to visit or remain with a parent.

Just a suggestion, I'm on your side.

The saying is you never really know someone until you divorce them.

Cat