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(Message started by: Asa on Mar 31st, 2008, 10:37pm)
Title: Tired
Post by Asa on Mar 31st, 2008, 10:37pm
I'm tired of it guys and gals.  I went for over 6 months with no trouble and now, in the past week, am going through the wringer.  NO, I'm not talking suicide.  I'm just really, really tired of fighting this all the time.  I think it's the quiet in between bouts that lulls me into thinking I'm back to normal.  Then WHAM!  It's back.

I know it's a stupid question but...have you all gone through this before?  How'd you get past it?
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Linda_Howell on Mar 31st, 2008, 10:42pm


Yes.  For 21 years now.

You do what has to be done.  You survive because the alternative..... isn't one.
Title: Re: Tired
Post by CostaRicaKris on Mar 31st, 2008, 10:57pm
Linda's right. You just keep doing it (I guess Nike is right too) Personally, it helps me to remember that at least it's not going to kill me and it could be worse. It's painful and it gets old, but I can get through it.
My husband has Macular Degeneration. He is going blind and there is nothing we can do about it. I'm the lucky one.
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Linda_Howell on Mar 31st, 2008, 11:10pm


Asa,

I've had a few mins. to think since I posted and now I'd like to ask you.. what can we help you with?

After 21 yrs. of being chronic I tend to be a bit short with someone who says "in the past week" they're going through the wringer.


I apologize and ask you again, how can we help?

Linda
Title: Re: Tired
Post by cynjeep89 on Mar 31st, 2008, 11:11pm
We get thru it and so can you.

During my last cycle, I remember being at work one morning after having battled the beast the night before.

While I was standing waiting for the elevator, I was having myself a good old pity party.

The skin on the right side of my face felt like it was on fire, my scalp felt like Norm Abrams has run his sander across it all night, I was weak, my teeth hurt, my eyes were dry, it hurt to blink, my shoulder and neck muscles were full of knots and I was exhausted.  All I wanted to do was go home, shut my door against the world and never come out again.

I heard the elevator bell ring, turned around and then heard a little squeaky voice say, "Hi".

There in the elevator was a red Radio Flyer wagon with a little boy sitting in it and you could tell that he had been receiving chemotherapy treatments.  He had IVs in his arm, a few wisps of hair but a smile that could melt even the hardest heart.

If this child could manage to smile and greet me with his great big "Hi" then I sure as hell had nothing to complain about.

That was the last time I felt sorry for myself.  My CHs won't kill me.  I can only hope the same for that child.

Title: Re: Tired
Post by Asa on Apr 1st, 2008, 7:18pm
You coined it...I was just having a pity party.  I know there are people out there who are much worse off than I am.  I know that things for me could be a lot worse.  but that still doesn't keep me from being...well, just tired of it.  
Thanks for the words of encouragement from those of you who offered.  They helped.  
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Asa on Apr 1st, 2008, 7:21pm
And to you Linda..."After 21 yrs. of being chronic I tend to be a bit short with someone who says "in the past week" they're going through the wringer."  Yes, that was a bit insensitive.  I've been going through these things quite a bit longer than the past week and, in a moment of looking for a bit of support, posted my feelings.  
Don't worry. that doesn't happen too often with me so you don't to worry about being short with me again.  Sorry to have bothered you.
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Jonny on Apr 1st, 2008, 7:21pm

on 03/31/08 at 22:37:22, Asa wrote:
I know it's a stupid question but...have you all gone through this before?  How'd you get past it?


No, its not a stupid question......and yes, I was chronic for 31 years!

You live the PF time and fight when you need to, thats how you get through it.
Title: Re: Tired
Post by vietvet2tours on Apr 1st, 2008, 7:46pm

on 04/01/08 at 19:21:39, Asa wrote:
And to you Linda..."After 21 yrs. of being chronic I tend to be a bit short with someone who says "in the past week" they're going through the wringer."  Yes, that was a bit insensitive.  I've been going through these things quite a bit longer than the past week and, in a moment of looking for a bit of support, posted my feelings.  
Don't worry. that doesn't happen too often with me so you don't to worry about being short with me again.  Sorry to have bothered you.


It's big girl panties time my friend.

       Potter
Title: Re: Tired
Post by cynjeep89 on Apr 1st, 2008, 8:05pm
Asa,

We have all been thru this and I'm sure most of us have felt the same way you are feeling right now.

Sure we all get tired of fighting the beast but we have to.  I have thought of the "other option" a few times in the past but it's no longer an option for me.

With the exception of a couple of stray hits and some shadows here and there, I have been pain free for 2 1/2 years but I know that there is always a chance that could change in an instant.

I never think that I am back to normal but I do take advantage of the pain free time the best that I can.

Look at all of the names on this board.....they made it thru and so can you.
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Jonny on Apr 1st, 2008, 8:11pm

on 04/01/08 at 20:05:54, cynjeep89 wrote:
Look at all of the names on this board.....they made it thru and so can you.


BINGO!!!!!, Cyn!  :-*
Title: Re: Tired
Post by PollyPocket on Apr 1st, 2008, 8:18pm
Asa hon, I sure understood that, as do most of us. About 2 months into my cycle, I'm pretty worn out and pretty pissy and think I just can't do this any more.

But I do, and I learned, I CAN. Learn to live between the hits, between the cycles. I've had my share of pity parties (oh lord have I ever!) but learned to look at this with a different perspective.  Yep, I have CH, but it doesn't own me.

Enjoy your pf time. Its not being lulled, its focusing on the good. When you're feeling like you need some vibes, by all means, ASK. We've all been there. And when you're ready to, pull yourself back up and be here for someone else who's gonna need YOUR strength some time.

Hugs and pf time,
Jen
Title: Re: Tired
Post by CostaRicaKris on Apr 1st, 2008, 9:20pm

on 04/01/08 at 19:21:39, Asa wrote:
 Sorry to have bothered you.


That's what this board is here for Asa. We all need to vent and to share occasionally. And sometimes we just need to be reminded that we are not alone and we can get through it. You haven't bothered anyone. ;-)

~Kris
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Jonny on Apr 1st, 2008, 9:30pm

on 04/01/08 at 21:20:50, CostaRicaKris wrote:
That's what this board is here for Asa. We all need to vent and to share occasionally. And sometimes we just need to be reminded that we are not alone and we can get through it. You haven't bothered anyone. ;-)

~Kris


Give Kris a golden oar for knowing what the deal is!!!!
Title: Re: Tired
Post by stevegeebe on Apr 1st, 2008, 10:12pm
Me too Asa.

Mines been ramping up for about a week now.  All I been thinking about is the pain free time ahead once it's over.  I'm going to make it through and you will too.

Hope it a short spell.

Welcome to Clusterville.

Steve G
Title: Re: Tired
Post by debOUCH on Apr 1st, 2008, 10:44pm
Asa.................it's "okay" to be tired, it is like fighting your own BIG war .........i am new @ this, just finished my first ever cycle of 60 days................however, i did learn many things in this short span of time.......... #1 being that without these caring people here i would have never made it through, and #2...THIS BEAST HAS MADE ME THE STRONGEST WOMAN I COULD POSSIBLY BE..........IT'S AMAZING WHAT ONE CAN DO WHEN GIVEN NO OTHER CHOICE..........................when/if  my beast returns I will have no other choice but to fight the battle again....................keep your positive thoughts going............enjoy those PF times, and as all told me.this is a good place to be @ a bad time........................ [smiley=hug.gif]your way
deb
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Asa on Apr 2nd, 2008, 5:26pm
I know, I know y'all.  I was really having a bad day and was just sick and tired of being sick and tired.  You know?  
Thanks to (almost) all of you.  = )
Got my big girl panties on now and am pushing on!
Title: Re: Tired
Post by echo on Apr 2nd, 2008, 5:42pm
Just take it a CH at a time and push through.  They eventually tapper off and you wait for the next dance.

I think I'm creaping up on 35 years now.  Most chronic with an ocassional spurt of eposodic thrown into the mix.
Title: Re: Tired
Post by PollyPocket on Apr 2nd, 2008, 7:28pm

on 04/02/08 at 17:26:29, Asa wrote:
Got my big girl panties on now and am pushing on!


Thats the spirit!  LOL

[smiley=hug.gif]

Hang in there my new friend!  You'll get thru this :)

Jen
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Charlie on Apr 2nd, 2008, 10:48pm
You're doing just fine Asa. Your coming here to vent was one of the healthiest things you could have done.

I had this thing for 22 years. I was episodic though and had good luck with a technique that I guess I better post again. Try it.
                      Dr. Wright’s Circulatory Technique:

I am not sure what mechanism is triggered by this but whatever it is, at least indirectly helps kill the pain. I do know that this technique has nothing to do with meditation, relaxation, or psychic ability. It is entirely physical and takes some work. It involves concentrating on trying to redirect a little circulation to the arms, hands, or legs. Think of feeling your pulse in your hand. Increased circulation will result in a reddening and warming of the hands. The important and difficult part is that it has to be done without interruption through the pain. Do not give up in frustration. It may not work on the first try. Try experimenting between attacks. You will find that it gets easier with practice. Every now and then it will work almost immediately. I lived for those moments.

I was given less than five minutes instruction in the use of method. The doctor, while placing his arm on his desk, showed me that he could slightly increase his arm and hand circulation. After several attempts, I was able to repeat this procedure and use it successfully. I have had about a 75% success rate shortening these attacks. My 20 minute attacks were often reduced to 10 minutes or less. Once proven that I had a chance to effectively deal with this horror, I always gave it a try as I had nothing to lose but pain.

I used to try to imagine I was pushing blood away from my neck into my arm. Use your imagination. There is one man who wrote that his standing barefoot on a concrete floor shortened his attacks. This may be similar as it draws some circulation away from the head. Cold water, exercise, or anything affecting circulation, seems to be worth a try. My suggestion is to not let up immediately when the pain goes. Waiting a minute is probably a good idea. So long as you do not slack off, this has a chance of working.

This technique is very useful while waiting for medication to take effect or when none is available. It costs nothing, is non-invasive, and can be used just about anywhere. It is not a miracle but it helped me deal with this horror. It can be a bit exhausting but the success rate was good enough for me and a cluster headache sufferer will do just about anything to end the pain. It gives us a fighting chance.

Good luck.

Charlie      
Title: Re: Tired
Post by Asa on Apr 3rd, 2008, 4:00pm
Kris, Jonny, Deb (and anyone else I missed)...thanks for the support!

Steve G., hang in there!  These things suck but, like most of them said, we get through it.  I'm heading down to San Antonio to finally see a specialist.  I'll let you know if he tells me anything new.  (But after being in here for over a year, I seriously doubt he'll say something that hasn't been posted already.)

Charlie, I don't know.  I'll certainly try it.  I stuck my head into ice cold water once after having it suggested (didn't work, by the way).  :D

And Jen, if that's your photo...wow!     :o   But seriously, thanks for the words.  
Title: Re: Tired
Post by BarbaraD on Apr 3rd, 2008, 4:14pm

on 04/03/08 at 16:00:29, Asa wrote:
Kris,
Charlie, I don't know.  I'll certainly try it.  I stuck my head into ice cold water once after having it suggested (didn't work, by the way).  :D

 

LMAO -- that's the spirit kiddo... Heck I wore banana peels around my head all day cause my hubby heard that was a "sure fire cure!" Fruit flies loved it, but it didn't work worth a darn.

Go ahead and vent all you want. We have regular pity parties here daily. Right now I'm going thru a high cycle with mine (I'm chronic) and am pretty damn sick of them. So when your party's over we can begin mine. ;)

Seriously, welcome to Clusterville. We're here for support - that's what we do best and we DO know how you feel....

Hugs BD
Title: Re: Tired
Post by CostaRicaKris on Apr 3rd, 2008, 11:29pm
Let us know how it goes with the specialist and hang in there  ;)
If you haven't noticed, there is always someone around here to chat with if you need to.


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