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Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> Totally Useless Questions
(Message started by: taraann on Jun 2nd, 2007, 1:57pm)

Title: Totally Useless Questions
Post by taraann on Jun 2nd, 2007, 1:57pm
Totally "Useless"

( If all is not lost where is it?)

Questions



Is the hokee pokee really what its all about ?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains ?

How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges ?

What happens if you get "scared  half to death" twice ?

If bankers could count how come there are 8  windows and only 4 tellers ?

Would a fly without wings be called a "walk" ?

Is it true cannibals don't eat clowns  because they taste funny?

What was the best thing before sliced bread ?

If it's tourist season why can't we shoot them?

If all the world is a stage, where does the audience sit ?

Why can't I set my laser printer on "stun" ?

If the number 2 pencil is so popular why is it still number two ?

Why do they call them   hemorrhoids  instead of "asteroids"?

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink ?

Why do   psychics have to ask your name ?

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn ?

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets ?

Why do they put   Braille dots on the keyboard of the drive-in ATM ?

Why is the alphabet in that order, is it because of that song ?

If most car accidents occur within five miles  of  home, why doesn't everyone just move ten miles away ?  

If you write a book about failure and it doesn't sell , is it a success ?

Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays ?

How do they get the deer to cross at theyellow signs ?

If white wine goes with fish , do white grapes go with sushi ?

If love is blind why is lingerie so popular ?

If you're born again , do you have two belly buttons ?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery ?

If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it ?

How is it possible to have a civil war ?

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have  to drown too ? Thanks to: dyancu

How happy are larks, really?

Why do they say "near-miss", when referring to no collision?
If it's a near-miss, didn't they hit? thanks to: susan

 

Title: Re: Totally Useless Questions
Post by andrewjb on Jun 3rd, 2007, 6:08pm
[smiley=laugh.gif].

Title: Re: Totally Useless Questions
Post by sandie99 on Jun 5th, 2007, 3:09am
Great questions! ;;D

Title: Re: Totally Useless Questions
Post by Sandy_C on Jun 6th, 2007, 5:35pm
If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

When the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Why is the word abbreviation so long?

When companies ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there interstates in Hawaii?

Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations when smoking is prohibited?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?

If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast on the back of a cat and dropped it?

If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn on your headlights, do they do anything?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do we drive on parkways when we park on driveways?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called shipment but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes -- why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn the radio down?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?

If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out it's nose?

Why is brassiere singular and panties plural?

What's another word for thesaurus?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

Why does Porky Pig wear a shirt but no pants.

Also, Why does Porky Pig wear a towel around his waist after a shower, and then remove the towel and put on a shirt with no pants?



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