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        Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> woman & drink
        
(Message started by: Yorky on Apr 26^th, 2007, 12:30pm)

Title: woman & drink
Post by Yorky on Apr 26^th, 2007, 12:30pm

u've been hit by the

|^^^^^^^^^^^^^^| ||
|...WINE TRUCK..........| ||'|";, ___.
|_..._..._______===|=||_|__|..., ] -
"(@)'(@)"" "''"**|(@)(@)*****''(@)

ONCE YOU'VE BEEN HIT, YOU HAVE TO HIT 5 WOMEN WHO LIKE TO HAVE FUN; INCLUDING THE ONE WHO SENT IT TO U . IF YOU GET HIT AGAIN YOU'LL KNOW YOU REALLY HAVE A PROBLEM !

WHEN GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH............

1. WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE OUR PURSE IS.

2. WE BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH OUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING OUR BUTT WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.

3. WE'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S BUTT AND HONESTLY BELIEVE WE COULD DO IT TOO.

4. IN OUR LAST TRIP TO PEE, WE REALIZE THAT WE NOW LOOK
MORE LIKE A HOMELESS HOOKER THAN THE GODDESS WE WERE JUST FOUR HOURS AGO.

5. WE START CRYING AND TELLING EVERYONE WE SEE THAT WE LOVE THEM SOOOOO MUCH.

6. WE GET EXTREMELY EXCITED AND JUMP UP AND DOWN EVERY TIME A NEW SONG PLAY'S BECAUSE "OH MY GOD! I LOVE THIS SONG!"

7. WE'VE FOUND A DEEPER/SPIRITUAL SIDE TO THE GEEK SITTING NEXT TO US.

8. WE'VE SUDDENLY TAKEN UP SMOKING AND BECOME REALLY GOOD AT IT.

9. WE YELL AT THE BARTENDER, WHO WE BELIEVE CHEATED US BY GIVING US JUST LEMONADE, BUT THAT'S JUST BECAUSE WE CAN NO LONGER TASTE THE GIN.

10. WE THINK WE ARE IN BED, BUT OUR PILLOW FEELS STRANGELY LIKE THE KITCHEN FLOOR (or the mop?)

11. WE FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN WE SIT ON IT.

12. WE TAKE OUR SHOES OFF BECAUSE WE BELIEVE IT'S THEIR
FAULT THAT WE'RE HAVING PROBLEMS WALKING STRAIGHT

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by aprilbee on Apr 26^th, 2007, 2:04pm

This also works when we drink to much takillya! And I would also like to add....we will go home with anyone who asks when the tequila takes affect..... ;)

(uh..that may just apply to me....)

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by JeffB on Apr 27^th, 2007, 11:42am

Can I buy you a few dozen shots?? ;;D

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by LeLimey on Apr 27^th, 2007, 11:58am

Jeffie it would take more than a few dozen shots ;;D

Your best chance of getting lucky is chloroform lovey ;)

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by JeffB on Apr 27^th, 2007, 10:55pm

on 04/27/07 at 11:58:04, LeLimey wrote:

Jeffie it would take more than a few dozen shots ;;D

Your best chance of getting lucky is chloroform lovey ;)

Chloroform, of course. Brilliant. Now we know why so many men went missing on that little island you live on. I believe there were movies based on "actual" events called...."28 days" and the other "Shawn of the dead."

I bet with your technique, I'll be doin the nasty with a bevy of ~~passed [s]out, zombie~~[/s] women by tomorrow night! [smiley=mellow.gif]

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by alienspacebabe on Apr 28^th, 2007, 1:01am

on 04/26/07 at 12:30:19, Yorky wrote:

11. WE FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN WE SIT ON IT.

How'd you know? :-X

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by LeLimey on Apr 28^th, 2007, 2:18am

on 04/27/07 at 22:55:13, JeffB wrote:

I bet with your technique, I'll be doin the nasty with a bevy of ~~passed [s]out, zombie~~[/s] women by tomorrow night! [smiley=mellow.gif]

Posy the pig, Clarice the Cow, Daisy the dog and Sharon the Sheep no doubt ::)

You wouldn't get close enough to the two legged variety to be ABLE to chloroform them lovey :P

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by JeffB on Apr 28^th, 2007, 9:56pm

Brutal! ;;D

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by LeLimey on Apr 29^th, 2007, 4:45am

Yes - but you wouldn't love me any other way ;;D

Title: Re: woman & drink
Post by Rosybabe on May 8^th, 2007, 3:54pm

[smiley=crackup.gif]