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        Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> 10 Husbands
        
(Message started by: JeffB on Jan 19^th, 2007, 4:46pm)

Title: 10 Husbands
Post by JeffB on Jan 19^th, 2007, 4:46pm

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin.

What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?

"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative;
he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in Software Services;
he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from Field Services;
he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in Telemarketing;
even though he knew he had the order, didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an Engineer;
he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from Finance and Administration;
he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in Marketing;
although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychiatrist;
all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist;
all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector;
all he ever did was ... God, I miss him!

"But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the husband, "but, why?"
"Duh; you're a LAWYER. This time I KNOW I'm gonna get screwed!"

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by LeLimey on Jan 19^th, 2007, 5:03pm

You're an Admin guy right Jefferooni?! ::)

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by JeffB on Jan 19^th, 2007, 5:16pm

:-[Yeah, But I really wanna be a lumberjack if thats o.k. ...........................And hang around in bars! ;;D

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by LeLimey on Jan 19^th, 2007, 5:24pm

Don't tell me.. you've got your "splinter" in your hand as you type huh?! ::) You've got the bar bit sorted anyhow :-*

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by JeffB on Jan 19^th, 2007, 6:00pm

Let all sing along ;;D

I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay.
I sleep all night and I work all day.

MOUNTIES:
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

BARBER:
I cut down trees. I eat my lunch.
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shoppin'
And have buttered scones for tea.

MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He eats his lunch.
He goes to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays he goes shopping
And has buttered scones for tea.

He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

BARBER:
I cut down trees. I skip and jump.
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing
And hang around in bars.

MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He skips and jumps.
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around in bars?!

He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

BARBER:
I cut down trees. I wear high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie,
Just like my dear Papa.

MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He wears high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra?!

[talking]
What's this? Wants to be a girlie?! Oh, My!
And I thought you were so rugged! Poofter!...

[singing]
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

He's a lumberjack, and he's okaaaaay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by artonio7 on Jan 19^th, 2007, 7:41pm

on 01/19/07 at 18:00:58, JeffB wrote:

Let all sing along ;;D

I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay.
I sleep all night and I work all day..................

http://artonio7.com/python_lumberjack.mp3 ;;D

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by andrewjb on Jan 19^th, 2007, 8:59pm

[smiley=laugh.gif].

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by alienspacebabe on Jan 20^th, 2007, 12:42am

on 01/19/07 at 16:46:31, JeffB wrote:

Husband #8 was a psychiatrist;
all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist;
all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector;
all he ever did was ... God, I miss him!

How about a psychiatrist/stamp collector? Lots of talking about it, then.........

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by sandie99 on Jan 22^nd, 2007, 11:55am

[smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: 10 Husbands
Post by MR_FLOOR on Jun 7^th, 2007, 1:16am

;;D