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        Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> From the mouths of kids
        
(Message started by: tanner on Nov 10^th, 2006, 6:19pm)

Title: From the mouths of kids
Post by tanner on Nov 10^th, 2006, 6:19pm

> A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallowa human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat wasvery small.The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow ahuman; it was physically impossible.The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"The little girl replied, "Then you ask him " >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> > A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children whilethey were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see eachchild's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she askedwhat the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girlreplied, "They will in a minute.">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with herfive and six year olds.After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thyMother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treatour brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family)answered, "Thou shall not kill.">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do thedishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother hadseveral strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunettehead.She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some ofyour hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong andmake me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and thensaid, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying topersuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture."Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grownup and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael,he's a doctor.' A small voice a t the back of the room rang out, "And there's theteacher, she's dead."_________________________________________________________A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Tryingto make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on myhead, the blood, as you know, would run into it , and I would turn redin the face."Yes," the class said."Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinaryposition the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted,"Cause your feet ain't empty."__________________________________________________________The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementaryschool for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:"Take only ONE. God is watching."Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the tablewas a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

Title: Re: From the mouths of kids
Post by taraann on Nov 10^th, 2006, 9:36pm

Quote:

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do thedishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother hadseveral strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunettehead.She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some ofyour hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong andmake me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and thensaid, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?">>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Now that one is priceless!

Title: Re: From the mouths of kids
Post by andrewjb on Nov 11^th, 2006, 7:37am

:), lovely. kids eh, what happens ?

Title: Re: From the mouths of kids
Post by sandie99 on Nov 14^th, 2006, 7:19am

:) :) :)