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        Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> Hormone Hostage
        
(Message started by: Sybil on Oct 25^th, 2006, 2:28pm)

Title: Hormone Hostage
Post by Sybil on Oct 25^th, 2006, 2:28pm

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some wine.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Wow, you sure look good in brown!
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some wine

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some wine.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some wine.

DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some more wine.

10 Things PMS Stands For:

1 Pass My Shotgun; 2 Psychotic Mood Shift; 3 Perpetual Munching Spree; 4 Puffy Mid-Section; 5 People Make me Sick; 6 Provide Me with Sweets; 7 Pass My Sweat pants; 8 Pissy Mood Syndrome; 9 Pack My Stuff; and my favorite one: 10 Potential Murder Suspect

Title: Re: Hormone Hostage
Post by JeffB on Oct 25^th, 2006, 3:18pm

;;D

Nice!

Title: Re: Hormone Hostage
Post by Barry_T_Coles on Oct 25^th, 2006, 7:26pm

[smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif]
Scientific Fact:

A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces
attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle.

For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with
rugged, masculine features.

And just before she is menstruating she prefers a man doused in
petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eyes and
a cricket stump shoved up his arse.
;;D

Title: Re: Hormone Hostage
Post by andrewjb on Oct 25^th, 2006, 11:26pm

[smiley=laugh.gif]. [smiley=laugh.gif]. wonderful.