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        Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> Living Will Form
        
(Message started by: mynm156 on Jul 31^st, 2006, 10:13pm)

Title: Living Will Form
Post by mynm156 on Jul 31^st, 2006, 10:13pm

Living Will Form

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to
be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead
politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on
it. Nor in the hands of lawyers/doctors who are interested simply in running
up the bills.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of
the following:

Bloody Mary,
Margarita,
Scotch and soda,
Martini,
Vodka and Tonic,
steak,
lobster or crab legs,
the remote control,
bowl of ice cream,
the sports page,
chocolate,
or sex

...it should be presumed that I won't ever get better.

When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person
and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a
day.

At this point, it is time to call a New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to come do
their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise their glasses
to toast the good times we have had.

Signature: ___________________________

Date: __________________________

I also hear that in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The
patients are happier and they have a lot more visitors.