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Title: Need another critique Post by athos12 on Dec 9th, 2003, 10:32pm here is an ad that I just finished for a national golf mag...... my first national ad!!!! Let me know what you think.... http://www.inovion.com/~reality/downloads/magazine-Layout10.jpg BTW the memberships are only $35,000 for a life time and 4,300 annaul dues... Hell that is a lot of damn money for Golf... |
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Title: Re: Need another critique Post by ClusterChuck on Dec 9th, 2003, 10:59pm Looks great, Athos!!! Good job! Nice layout. Appealing photo. Simple, to the point. Chuck |
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Title: Re: Need another critique Post by grumpett on Dec 9th, 2003, 11:11pm Well, I don't know alot about advertizing, But...... If I had that kinda money to play golf, I would certanly chose that one. But then again, What do I know. Any thing on sports bars? |
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Title: Re: Need another critique Post by Charlie on Dec 9th, 2003, 11:16pm Sign me up. I'll knock over 835 gas stations for a down payment Looks great from here. Quiet too Charlie |
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Title: Re: Need another critique Post by Little Deb on Dec 9th, 2003, 11:19pm Hi. Don't know you, but since you asked for general opinions... can I tell you my 2 cents?? hhmmmm....clean desert mountain air... i am not sure desert air is clean..... how about just...clean mountain air... but if you want all of it, shouldn't there be a comma after clean? or a slash between desert/mountain, cause desert isn't an adjective of mountain. i don't think. next: the paragraph "The quality...... I'm thinking it is too long of a sentence. How about: The quality atmosphere and service you would expect at a private golf club. This exclusive, gated, master-planned community centers around an Arnold Palmer Signature Golf Course and is waiting for you. Come join us at The Refuge Golf Club. And at the bottom, shouldn't there be a comma between Lake Havasu and Arizona?? ok, shutting up now.....little deb All the rest looks AWESOME!!!!!! |
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Title: Re: Need another critique Post by cootie on Dec 9th, 2003, 11:29pm Very nicely done....I like it !!!! Sending in my membership now......breakin out the monopoly money ! I doubt I'd meet there criteria Pam [smiley=nono.gif] |
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Title: Re: Need another critique Post by thomas on Dec 10th, 2003, 9:05am Looks good, when's our tee-time? ;) |
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Title: Re: Need another critique Post by athos12 on Dec 10th, 2003, 10:17am Thanks for the feedback...... I especially appreciate your comments Little Deb.... I like people being critical of my work.... help me to be better. |
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