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        New Message Board Archives >> 2007 General Board Posts >> Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi. 
        
(Message started by: Jonny on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:08pm)

Title: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Jonny on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:08pm

Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi. But Guns Still Mandatory

In a stunning legislative move, the Supreme Court of Mississippi (which consists of three men named Billy Bob and a cocker spaniel) banned the sale, advertising, or exhibiting of any three-dimensional device used primarily for the stimulation of human genitalia.

The landmark decision makes sex toy possession a felony punishable by up to 5 years in prison and/or a $75 fine. Once the controversial law passed, Mississippi's governor Haley Barbour authorized several sting operations across the state to rid Mississippi of the phallic threat to southern life, a threat second only to terrorism in these dangerous and vulnerable times.

At an adult store named Good Vibrations on the east side of Jackson, several undercover policemen witnessed the sale of not one, not two, but 18 individual sex toys during lunch hour earlier this week. "Things were really buzzing at the store," commented store owner Gale McFarland from behind bars in the Jackson state prison for women. "None of us realized that the hot men in trench coats were cops. We thought they were Atlanta metrosexuals in the market for some new anal plugs. When they asked to frisk us, we just thought they were ordinary perverts," said the 61 year old grandmother of four. McFarland and her employees are eligible for parole in 2010.

Outlawed in Texas also

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=279_1184350624

WTF is wrong with these law makers?

(Brought to you by Jonnys "WTF is wrong with this" ;;D )

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:16pm

;;D ;;D ;;D ;;D

Yeah...they definately should be locked up..right up there with molesters, rapists, murderers....uh..yeah ok.

And how exactly do they "catch" people that already own them...never mind, don't answer that. We could really run with this one.

As far as Im concerned this marks the stupidist thing I have EVER heard.

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by AussieBrian on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:27pm

Vibrator will do you no good anyway, Jonny, just chip your teeth. Like when Chewy took a blow-up doll back to the store and complained it went down on him - manager tried to charge him double.

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Jonny on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:29pm

on 07/13/07 at 20:27:11, AussieBrian wrote:

Vibrator will do you no good anyway, Jonny, just chip your teeth. Like when Chewy took a blow-up doll back to the store and complained it went down on him - manager tried to charge him double.

;;D

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Rosybabe on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:35pm

[smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by George_J on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:37pm

I think everyone in America ought to mail Governor Haley Barbour a dildo.

Best,

George

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Sheena on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:38pm

Time to move!

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Jonny on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:48pm

on 07/13/07 at 20:37:54, George_J wrote:

I think everyone in America ought to mail Governor Haley Barbour a dildo.

LMMFAO!!!! ;;D

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 13^th, 2007, 8:53pm

ya know...George may have a really good idea.

If just the people from this board alone participated...it sure as hell would make a dent.

If nothing else it would be as funny as hell...can you imagine how pissed off he would be???

Better yet, a box, stuffed with them,so that when he slices it open they spill on him...

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Redd on Jul 13^th, 2007, 9:03pm

There goes my stock in Energizer..... :-/

[smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Jonny on Jul 13^th, 2007, 9:12pm

on 07/13/07 at 21:03:41, Redd wrote:

There goes my stock in Energizer..... :-/

[smiley=laugh.gif]

Thanks for the visual ;;D

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Redd on Jul 13^th, 2007, 9:40pm

on 07/13/07 at 21:12:57, Jonny wrote:

Thanks for the visual ;;D

Only YOU would comment on that Jonny...but I still luvs ya... :-*

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by deltadarlin on Jul 13^th, 2007, 9:45pm

So do Kansas, Louisiana, Texas, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, and Virginia. BUT, I think they forgot to tell a lot of shop owners in Louisiana (New Orleans is full of sex shops and Shreveport has several) and Texas.

Where I live (city), you can sell all manner of *party* favors, but you can't sell porn movies.

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Turts on Jul 13^th, 2007, 10:59pm

Quote:

I think everyone in America ought to mail Governor Haley Barbour a dildo.

Best,

George

i think the Guvna may BE a dildo!!!

jealousy perhaps, maybe he is trying to increase his odds of getting lucky!!!

Lord knows he needs it lookin like that!!

Turts

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by MR_FLOOR on Jul 13^th, 2007, 11:08pm

It's good to see are lawmakers are hard at work.Talk about a waste of time >:(.

Dave

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Charlie on Jul 14^th, 2007, 12:45am

What? No Hello Kitty vibrators in Mississippi? For shame.

We need more revelations like the one from the Louisiana Senator the other day that he paid the D. C. Madam to dress him in diapers. It's been a fun week for family values politicians.

Too bad they didn't "abstain." http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/gifs/jerk off.gif

Charlie

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Klusterkopf on Jul 14^th, 2007, 3:07am

Proper incest can ONLY be performed with the REAL THING! Long live the DEEP South! Proper incest cannot be performed with toys ;) :D

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 14^th, 2007, 4:45am

Absolutely Turts...as if they arent those other dumb issues...like terrorism, homelessness, starving....sheesh...and THIS is what they spend their time and taxpayers MONEY ON????

"Staking out" an adult toy store??? ::) ::) ::) ::) What a dangerous mission...

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by davyp on Jul 14^th, 2007, 6:47am

Are they going to have a vibrator amnesty [smiley=huh.gif]

In the UK we very often have knife amnesty's where they put large metal bins outside the cop shops to put unwanted knives in,

OMG can you imagine the noise if they did that for vibrators ;;D

But on a plus point think of the jobs it will create, all the people needed for the roving vibrator patrols listening for that unmistakable buzzing sound ;;D

Dape

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 14^th, 2007, 6:59am

Oh Davy!! That would be gross!! ;;D ;;D ;;D ;;D

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Klusterkopf on Jul 14^th, 2007, 8:07am

Funny, in Germany and Holland and most of the rest of Europe, sex toys, pornos and prostitution are all legal and are sex crime rate is VERY low (There is a multimillion dollar company here, Beate Uhse, that has been profitibly making sex toys for over 25 years, all legal).. Like prohibition in your country in the 20's, to make something illegal creates demand and one just has to travel to a state where those items are legal to purchase them or buy them on the Black Market, at inflated (not a pun) prices. Is there a Bureau of Bedroom or Sex Police in America (1984!!)? Strange morality, as if banning vibrators, normally used in private by consenting adults, will lower crime. Oh well, thank gott fingers and tongues are still legal (although I understand that oral sex is STILL illegal in some states, the laws dating back to the 18th century). Gott bless Amerika! :) [smiley=huh.gif]

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by BarbaraD on Jul 14^th, 2007, 8:28am

Our tax dollars at WORK!!!!

Hugs BD

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Rosybabe on Jul 14^th, 2007, 8:32am

instead on outlawing vibrators and other BS, senators should worry about making law that every single car comes equiped with sensors so tragedies like this will never happen... :'(

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19752538/

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by BarbaraD on Jul 14^th, 2007, 9:01am

Well, in the immortal words of Charlton Heston: They'll get mine when they pry it out of my cold dead fingers! ;;D

Hugs BD

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by ClusterChuck on Jul 14^th, 2007, 9:07am

on 07/14/07 at 09:01:18, BarbaraD wrote:

They'll get mine when ...

<shudder>

Bless her heart ...
Oh the visual!!!

Chuck

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 14^th, 2007, 11:50am

That is very funny Barb... ;;D

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Charlie on Jul 14^th, 2007, 2:16pm

"Hi. This is Chris Hansen from MSNBC. We're doing a show on preeeverts that are addicted to vibrator use. What are you doing here? Do you think it appropriate to carry extra batteries around? What were you thinking? If you have anything more to say, we'd like to hear it; otherwise you're free to buzz your way out the door into the arms of the waiting vibrator police...or you can leave it here. We have a hell of time keeping the evidence."

Charlie

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Jonny on Jul 14^th, 2007, 2:43pm

This may take a minute to load, but its worth it....LOL ;;D

http://www.ilovewavs.com/comedy/PrankPhone/Prank%20Phone%20Calls%20-%20Recall%20on%20Vibrator%20-%20Roy%20D.%20Mercer.wav

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by barry_sword on Jul 14^th, 2007, 2:54pm

Boyfriend is so dead! She sure was a good sport about it though. [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif]

Barry

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 14^th, 2007, 4:36pm

That was funny...because it WASN'T ME!! You're right Barry...he would be DEAD. I would probably pass out from embarassment...take it from a woman...that is not a good idea...and be very afraid to walk through the door after that....or even more afraid is she says nothing... and when she expresses her admiration for Lorena Bobbit....

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by barry_sword on Jul 14^th, 2007, 5:00pm

The Bobbitts!!!! [smiley=JAW_DROP.gif]

Barry

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by stevegeebe on Jul 14^th, 2007, 6:28pm

In a related story, the bump in sales of electric tooth-brushes in Mississippi exceeds current inventory. Said, local Drug Store manager, "I can't explain the sudden concern in Oral Hygiene round these parts?"

Steve G

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 14^th, 2007, 8:49pm

Oh Geez!!! :D

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Klusterkopf on Jul 15^th, 2007, 7:40am

on 07/14/07 at 09:01:18, BarbaraD wrote:

Well, in the immortal words of Charlton Heston: They'll get mine when they pry it out of my cold dead fingers! ;;D

Hugs BD

I don't think that it would be difficult to pry a gun out of his cold alive fingers. He is as OLD as Moses!

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by burnt-toast on Jul 15^th, 2007, 8:32am

The law is absurd, proves nothing is out of the reach of government meddling.

I can already picture the media blitz as BATF, having changed its initials to BATFV, surrounds a small cabin on a remote mountain to take out a couple of felons wielding illegal vibrators.

The prank was funny,

Seems someone's bo' has chores that need attending to? Well… maybe the responsibility will fall to someone else after that prank.

Tom

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 15^th, 2007, 10:05am

Good one burnt...this story is some definate comedic material...

It is absolutely ridiculous. On a serious note, there are actually people incarcerated...deemed felons. Can you imagine if it were you?

I have had someone brutally assault me...I mean nearly kill me..he was trying. And he walks the streets...and these people, just making a living, are serving hard time.

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by Charlie on Jul 15^th, 2007, 6:08pm

http://www.schildersmilies.de/schilder/badidea.gif
Buzz off. :D

You're probably tired of my nostalgia about law enforement in the old days but this is one of those things that no one would enforce back then...like fireworks; cops took a wait and see attitude and knew we appreciated their doing so. Americans worried about serious stuff but at the same time had a lot of fun being nicer to one another.

Charlie

Title: Re: Vibrators Outlawed in Mississipi.
Post by sldrswyfe on Jul 15^th, 2007, 6:33pm

I like how you cleverly fit in "buzz" in your posts Charlie!

And no, I wish it was that way...I think it should be that way.