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Title: Since I havent been around.... Post by medic1852 on Jan 24th, 2007, 3:38pm Since I havent been around, even though I do drop by and read some of the threads I figured I would share a funny! Here is a list of reasons men should not be allowed in Wall Mart! Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired. Mrs. Fenton insists that he go with her to Walmart. He gets bored with all the shopping. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse. Here's a letter sent to her from the store. Dear Mrs. Fenton, Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below. Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart: 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking. 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals. 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms. 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares... and watched what happened. 5. Aug 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway. 6. Sept 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Sept 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. Sept 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Oct 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose. 10. Nov 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where to find the antidepressants. 11. Dec 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. Dec 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Dec 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. Dec 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" And last, but not least .... 15. Dec 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" Rodger ::) |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by tanner on Jan 24th, 2007, 4:14pm Thanks for the chuckle Rodg :D How about a quick: are you, your wife and the kids ok note? Miss ya Bro.........Tim |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by medic1852 on Jan 24th, 2007, 5:40pm My Amy~Do is just fine. The Hogs....Well they are wild as usual! Rodger |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by chewy on Jan 24th, 2007, 6:29pm Quote:
ROFL>>>>>>>>>>>I love it! |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by Woobie on Jan 25th, 2007, 12:43am on 01/24/07 at 15:38:42, medic1852 wrote:
i've done this. this is fun! you must do this when it's REALLy busy.. like the saturday afternoon before Christmas is good. but - now they put the condems behind the counter.... bastards! |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by artonio7 on Jan 25th, 2007, 2:14am on 01/25/07 at 00:43:00, Woobie wrote:
LMAO Oh that was good. Reminds me of when I was a kid. Susan, friend of mine used to rip on her mom all the time. She hated going grocery shopping with her... so one day while her mom wasn't looking she put bananas in her moms purse... when she went to check out and pay... naturally she had to open her purse. The cashier called the manager... they both ended up laughing their asses off. So the next day at school during lunch Susan opened her Lunch Bag only to find it was filled with the chicken bones of the previous night's dinner. Ahhh, I'll never forget the look on her face. with warm regards, Tony |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by zwibbs/Scott on Jan 25th, 2007, 4:57am It is really good to hear from you Rodger !! |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by LeLimey on Jan 25th, 2007, 6:06am Woobs I've done the condom thing too - its great fun! They aren't behind the counters here yet so come and visit and we can go for broke in the supermarkets! My piece de resistance was KY jelly in a priests (think he was Catholic) basket but its a LOT of fun when you get the fella's who troll supermarkets chatting up women and add a few packets of tampons to their trolley. They don't work out what's cramping their style til they get to the checkout! Now Rodgie - you may think you got away with going AWOL but I'm not a happy Helen >:( you've left it far too long and you must be punished! This time its serious though and there'll be no more chastising from me and Langa 'cos you bloody well like it too much ::) This time it's a week at the Chewy house of correction.. and may God have mercy on your soul! |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by taraann on Jan 25th, 2007, 5:24pm I've not really talked ya medic, but I remember reading threads from or commented on by you........... so ya post a funny then run??? huh huh huh? Don't think that's gonna be tolerated! Esp by Helen! ;) ;) ;) ;) |
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Title: Re: Since I havent been around.... Post by B14CK5H33P on Jan 25th, 2007, 6:43pm I did the condoms thing a zillion times... just don't let anyone catch you doing it! ;;D But... if you REALLY want to mess with one of the clerks' heads... Take a shopping cart. Fill it with KY, Vaseline, Turkey basters, spatulas and condoms. When you get to the register, you WILL see a shocked look from whoever is ringing up the items... especially when you reach for your wallet and say, "Oh No! I forgot my wallet! Daddy's gonna be pissed!" [smiley=laugh.gif] Good ta see ya Rodger, Carl D |
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