Clusterheadaches.com Message Board


    
      
        Clusterheadaches.com Message Board
        (http://www.clusterheadaches.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.cgi)
      

        New Message Board Archives >> 2006 General Board Posts >> Death of a Finch
        
(Message started by: georgej on Aug 20^th, 2006, 9:49pm)

Title: Death of a Finch
Post by georgej on Aug 20^th, 2006, 9:49pm

My daughter's zebra finch, Little Guy, died of old age last night.

El raises finches, and has about thirty of them at the moment. There's a certain attrition rate associated with this, and she accepts the losses with aplomb.

But Little Guy was special. He was a rejected nestling. El fed and cared for him with her own hands when she was ten years old. She even received permission to bring him to school so she could feed him every two hours. Little Guy imprinted on her, and from the day he could see, El was the center of his small universe. And his universe was suffused with joy--there's really no other word for it. His queen lived beside him, and he was fulfilled. I have never seen a creature so intensely alive and in love as this small, singing fellow who stood only four inches tall.

Unlike other finches, who are edgy around people, Little Guy danced in ecstacy whenever El entered the room. He buzzed his love song, and preened her extended finger. When he was released from his cage, he liked to sit on her head or arm, tugging her hair with all his small strength. El kept him in his own cage, next to her chair in her room, and spoke to him all the time, and called him "LG". The two were companions in mutual admiration. It is a deep mystery how two creatures so different as a small bird and a young girl could forge a bond so sparkling between them.

Last night around 9:00, El came out to tell me that LG was not doing well. With finches, this is not a good sign--it normally means they only have a few hours to live, and there's nothing really to be done. El kept him warm, gave him some cool water to drink and some soft mash to eat, and sat with him until he died. By 11:00, he was gone.

El is a very controlled and private person, but I could tell she was upset. She stayed in her room for a time, and I left her to grieve in her own way. She doesn't like me to see her cry.

She stayed up late.

I guess that, juxtaposed against the avalanche of horror that seems to be the lot, or perceived lot, of daily life now, the death of a finch could seem trivial. Perhaps it is trivial. But I don't think the loss of a friend is ever trivial.

El knows that she granted LG his life, and cared for him as best she could, and eased his death as far as she was able. It's the best that any one of us can ever hope to do for a friend.

(Yes, El will be fine.)

Thanks for listening. I'm still trying to sort this out in my mind--trying to understand it.

It feels, against all practicality and jadedness, and worldliness and all the hard crust that forms over us by middle age, as if something significant and moving has occurred.

Regards,

George

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by pattik on Aug 20^th, 2006, 10:21pm

A very poignant recounting, George. Thanks for sharing it.

Patti

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by Karla on Aug 20^th, 2006, 10:47pm

I also raised zebra and java rice finches for a while. We had a white java rice finch named "Peanut Butter" for close to 8 years. He died last year. I gave them away and quit raising them. It just hurt to much. They have such personalities. Sorry to hear of your loss.

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by Melissa on Aug 20^th, 2006, 10:49pm

on 08/20/06 at 21:49:03, georgej wrote:

It feels, against all practicality and jadedness, and worldliness and all the hard crust that forms over us by middle age, as if something significant and moving has occurred.

I think it gets us back in touch with our inner child, and what it felt like to have something so small be so profound and beautiful, and how devistating it is to grow and lose touch with it...

just my [smiley=twocents.gif]

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by Fredmyyster on Aug 20^th, 2006, 11:06pm

That was a wonderful story . Thank you for sharing and i am very sorry for ya'lls loss....

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by TxBasslady on Aug 21^st, 2006, 2:11am

Traumatic event for kiddos.

They have a real attachment to pets...and when something like this happens, they grieve.

I hope Ellen is better today. I'm so sorry she had to go through this.

Give her my love,

Jean

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by georgej on Aug 21^st, 2006, 2:37am

Thanks, all, for listening. Mel, thanks for the insight. And Karla, thank you for your understanding. Patti and Fred, thank you for your support. Ellen is reading this thread, and I know she feels a bit better knowing that others can understand.

And yes, Jean, Ellen is better today. :) So things go, and life continues.

Best,

George

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by Melissa on Aug 21^st, 2006, 8:47am

Oh bother, how very rude of me! I forgot to say, my condolences to El for the loss of her sweet little friend.

I'm so very sorry El. :(

hugs,
mel

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by nani on Aug 21^st, 2006, 9:39am

Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss, El. :'(
Life is full of all kinds of losses. The most important lesson we can learn is to love the best we can, in the time we have. And to always have a special place in our hearts for our lost loved ones. It seems you've done just that. You're a special young woman, for sure.
hugs, nani

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by seasonalboomer on Aug 21^st, 2006, 10:03am

When my German Shepherd passed away a couple years ago I was given a link to www.rainbowbridge.com by a friend who new I was grieving and trying to reconcile how I could feel so devastated by the loss of "Barney" yet react with such cold resolve to world around me about most other things.

It's a great site, but I would buy an extra box of kleenex before hitting the link.

Scott

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by Ree on Aug 21^st, 2006, 6:27pm

What a beautiful testimony to a finch that was so loved and as it is.... loved back... that was one beautiful story. I'm sure El will be ok holding his memory dear to her. I'm so sorry for your loss.....

love ree

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by Mosaicwench on Aug 22^nd, 2006, 7:30am

on 08/20/06 at 21:49:03, georgej wrote:

It feels, against all practicality and jadedness, and worldliness and all the hard crust that forms over us by middle age, as if something significant and moving has occurred.

The loss of any love and beauty in the world, whether 4 inches or 4 miles tall, is indeed profound and significant and moving.

My condolences to you and your family.

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by zwibbs/Scott on Aug 22^nd, 2006, 7:47am

George, You described everything so well. What a nice friend for your daughter. She'll get stronger with each passing day.

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by georgej on Aug 22^nd, 2006, 4:47pm

Thanks, everyone. El's doing fine, aside from having to get her shots for high school yesterday. Got Hep A, Hep B, chickenpox, meningitis, and a tetanus booster. Didn't like 'em.

She's still talking about LG (with affection and regret), but she decided to get a new pair of zebras to replace him. The new boy and girl have taken up residence in the accustomed spot, but so far they only have eyes for each other, and don't pay a lot of attention to the people in the room.

Anybody want zebra finch chicks? We'll probably have some more in the fullness of time.

Again, thanks, and best wishes,

George

Title: Re: Death of a Finch
Post by superhawk2300 on Aug 22^nd, 2006, 10:38pm

George,

That was a beautiful story, thank you for sharing it, my life is a little better for reading it. You give your loved ones relationship much honor with your recount. Bless you all.

Thanks