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        New Message Board Archives >> 2006 General Board Posts >> Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
        
(Message started by: BarbaraD on Jul 29th, 2006, 8:12am)
Title: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by BarbaraD on Jul 29th, 2006, 8:12am
Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks . A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack . Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Have a good weekend

Hugs BD
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Yorky on Jul 29th, 2006, 8:45am
we can also write our names in the snow when peeing!!!!your right it is quite good being a man,
as you have mentioned....all the good points....
if these are not a problem to us....why do the females ,share there assles with us?ie  does my bum look big in these ,wat shoes shall i wear/buy...etc the list is endless(our lass can have a 10 minute coversatioun with me without me knowing)
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by zwibbs/Scott on Jul 29th, 2006, 9:13am
The best way to answer this thread is to tell the Real story about Eve.......                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve.
"So, how is everything going?" inquired God.

"It is all so beautiful, God," she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem. It is these breasts you have given me.

The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They are a real pain," reported Eve.

And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc. ... she felt that having only two breasts might leave her body more "symmetrically balanced," as she put it.

"That is a fair point," replied God, "But it was my first shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away."

And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes.

Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden. "Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?"

"Just fantastic," she replied, "But for one oversight on your part. You see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull. All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone."

God thought for a moment and said, "You know, Eve, you are right.
How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you. Now let's see ... where did I put the useless boob?"

Now doesn't THAT make more sense than that story about the rib?












=

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Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by georgej on Jul 29th, 2006, 11:20am

on 07/29/06 at 08:45:33, Yorky wrote:
why do the females ,share there assles with us?ie  does my bum look big in these


I've concluded that there's no right way to answer these types of questions.

"Yes" is so obviously wrong that I don't even need to elaborate.

"No" means you're lying, or delusional.

"Your bum looks good in anything" is a patent, suck-up fraud.

"How 'bout those Seattle Mariners?"  means you're not listening.

It's a puzzle.

Best wishes,

George
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by TxBasslady on Jul 29th, 2006, 12:56pm

on 07/29/06 at 11:20:44, georgej wrote:
"Your bum looks good in anything" is a patent, suck-up fraud.



;;D  Yep, that's the worst thing any man could say.   [smiley=huh.gif]

I learned a long time ago not to ask a man nuthin   ;;D

Sheesh...it's not like I was listenin' anyway   ::)

See ya,

Jean
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by seansbetterhalf on Jul 29th, 2006, 1:36pm
Sorry for this being my first post BUT Zwibbs, that was the funniest thing I've read in a long time   [smiley=laugh.gif]

Thanks for the explanation of Sean's behavior  [smiley=laugh.gif]

Nice to meet you all, I feel like I already know you all :D

Barbara
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by TxBasslady on Jul 29th, 2006, 1:38pm
Hi Barby !!!

Wow...great seeing you here, sweetie!   :-*

Much love,

Jean

(modified..cause I forgot where my name went   ::))
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by seansbetterhalf on Jul 29th, 2006, 1:41pm
Hi Jean,

Yup! He's a boob! LOL!! [smiley=laugh.gif]

But a keeper anyway. ;)

Barbara
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by nani on Jul 29th, 2006, 1:43pm
Hi Barb!!!! Great to see you here!
hugs to you, the kids and the boob.  :)  love ya, nani
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by seansbetterhalf on Jul 29th, 2006, 1:53pm
Hi Nani!

How can I put a signature on here? I want it to say I love my BIG boob LOL!!!! That was hilarious!!!

Speaking of kids, I have to go check on them, thier in the pool with the boob LOL.[smiley=laugh.gif]

Nice to meet everybody! See you soon!

Barbara
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Linda_Howell on Jul 29th, 2006, 2:02pm


Barbara,

  At the top of the page go to "Profile"   when that comes up, scroll down to almost the bottom and you will see "personal Text" and a long box that you can type what you want into.


Linda
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Yorky on Jul 29th, 2006, 4:52pm

on 07/29/06 at 08:12:41, BarbaraD wrote:
Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks . A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack . Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Have a good weekend

Hugs BD
for a while ....i thought this would end up being a man only type thread........how wrong can you be?
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by zwibbs/Scott on Jul 29th, 2006, 5:13pm

on 07/29/06 at 13:36:18, seansbetterhalf wrote:
Sorry for this being my first post BUT Zwibbs, that was the funniest thing I've read in a long time   [smiley=laugh.gif]

Thanks for the explanation of Sean's behavior  [smiley=laugh.gif]

Nice to meet you all, I feel like I already know you all :D

Barbara

                                                                                                                                                                                    Thanks Barbara!!!  Glad you enjoyed it---Welcome----I'm amazed that you were the only one that thought it was funny----but---I guess I have been blackballed from this place.
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Yorky on Jul 29th, 2006, 5:55pm

on 07/29/06 at 17:13:31, zwibbs/Scott wrote:
                                                                                                                                                                                    Thanks Barbara!!!  Glad you enjoyed it---Welcome----I'm amazed that you were the only one that thought it was funny----but---I guess I have been blackballed from this place.
you have not been blackballed....we are only men!i found your explanation,amusing..but if god had given the female,the capacity to realise,that men make boob after boob....just got me thinking ,out of gods..7 days to create life/world...which day did he do it on.....my girl just wouldnt have been able to decide which day(she would make me choose the day,1000% i would have got that wrong,i know?
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Charlie on Jul 29th, 2006, 6:35pm
Welcome Barbara to the madhouse. http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/gifs/BLACKBOARD WELCOME.gif

Among the lunacy you'll find more and if you look real hard, lots of good information all over the place.

I hope you stick around. New blood is needed all the time. http://www.kolobok.wrg.ru/smiles/standart/declare.gif?SSImageQuality=Full

Charlie
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by ShadowLord on Jul 29th, 2006, 7:49pm

on 07/29/06 at 08:45:33, Yorky wrote:
does my bum look big in these

I have discovered the perfect answer for this question... Ya ready?  Here goes...

"Oh Hell yes, and I love it!  Turn around... I wanna see that arse again... Damn!  That's nice... Hold on... Let me get the camera..." and sing Rump Shaker by Wreckx-N-Effect while walking into the next room...

After that, she'll never want your opinion on her bum again.

PFDAN............................................................ ShadowLord
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Linda_Howell on Jul 29th, 2006, 8:01pm


Quote:
----but---I guess I have been blackballed from this place.


  Only by certain Califorians and Oregonians Swibby.  ;)
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Tim_w on Jul 29th, 2006, 8:22pm
BarbaraD
Iam not the happier sex - Iam just happy to have sex! ;;D
Happy Pappy
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by BarbaraD on Jul 30th, 2006, 12:18am

on 07/29/06 at 20:22:48, Tim_w wrote:
BarbaraD
Iam not the happier sex - Iam just happy to have sex! ;;D
Happy Pappy



Now just why does that NOT surpise me. BTW - my little Caleb is still showing everyone your picture under my bench.

Hugs BD
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by TxBasslady on Jul 30th, 2006, 3:17am

on 07/29/06 at 08:12:41, BarbaraD wrote:
The world is your urinal.



Yep, there it is, in a nutshell....when in doubt they just whip it out :o   ;;D

Jean
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by Jonny on Jul 30th, 2006, 3:32am

on 07/30/06 at 03:17:57, TxBasslady wrote:
Yep, there it is, in a nutshell....when in doubt they just whip it out :o   ;;D

Jean


Hell, if I had known that I wouldnt have worn pants at the convention ;;D
Title: Re: Why MEN are the "happier" sex.......
Post by TxBasslady on Jul 30th, 2006, 9:37pm

on 07/30/06 at 03:32:17, Jonny wrote:
Hell, if I had known that I wouldnt have worn pants at the convention ;;D



LMAO.... :o  Sheesh, I haven't recovered from the pic of you nekkid in the snow...yet.    :o   :-*

Gimme a break     [smiley=huh.gif]

Jean


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