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        New Message Board Archives >> 2006 General Board Posts >> Laws of the Land.....
        
(Message started by: BarbaraD on Jul 9^th, 2006, 7:24am)

Title: Laws of the Land.....
Post by BarbaraD on Jul 9^th, 2006, 7:24am

Natural Laws of the Universe...

Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least
accessible corner.

Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy
signal

Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because
you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will
have a flat tire.

Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you
were in will start to move faster than the one you are
in now.

Law of the Bath:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the
telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases
when you are with someone you don't want to be seen
with

Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to
the reach.

Law of the Theatre:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your
boss will ask you to do something which will last
until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they
will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing
face down on a floor covering are directly correlated
to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Location:
No matter where you go, there you are.

Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are
talking about.

Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like,
they will stop making it.

Title: Re: Laws of the Land.....
Post by Charlie on Jul 9^th, 2006, 1:08pm

Charlie's Law:

Spilled pills always fall over a sink with an open drain. It's always a prescription. http://www.kolobok.wrg.ru/smiles/standart/sclerosis.gif?SSImageQuality=Full

Charlie

Title: Re: Laws of the Land.....
Post by maffumatt on Jul 9^th, 2006, 1:18pm

Matts Law
the more you depend on someone else, the more disappointed you will be.

Title: Re: Laws of the Land.....
Post by Jonny on Jul 9^th, 2006, 1:22pm

Jonnys law

If it stinks dont put your dick in it!

Title: Re: Laws of the Land.....
Post by purpleydog on Jul 9^th, 2006, 1:24pm

Coles Law:

Finely chopped cabbage.

Title: Re: Laws of the Land.....
Post by KingOfPain on Jul 10^th, 2006, 1:55am

on 07/09/06 at 07:24:53, BarbaraD wrote:

I'd like to add one to these...

Law of Mechanical Tightness:
The tightness of a nut or bolt is in direct proportion to how difficult it is to get at.

http://bestsmileys.com/working/5.gif

Title: Re: Laws of the Land.....
Post by rickyshot on Jul 10^th, 2006, 10:17am

on 07/09/06 at 13:22:08, Jonny wrote:

Jonnys law

If it stinks dont put your dick in it!

So keep it out of the toilet Jonny. ;;D

Title: Re: Laws of the Land.....
Post by jimmers on Jul 10^th, 2006, 10:41am

Jimmers Law.

If you want to make a right turn at the next light, someone will be in that lane going straight. with no one in the left lane.

Jimmers