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Title: Why did God make Mothers? Post by minnie on Feb 22nd, 2006, 4:01pm Why God made moms" answers given by elementary school age children >to the following questions... > Be sure to read the story at the end..... > > > > Why did God make mothers? > > 1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. > > 2. Mostly to clean the house. > > 3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. > > > > How did God make mothers? > > 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. > > 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. > > 3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used >bigger parts. > > > > What ingredients are mothers made of? > > 1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything >nice in the world and one dab of mean. > > 2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly >use string, I think. > > > > Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mom? > > 1. We're related. > > 2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like >me. > > > > What kind of little girl was your Mom? > > 1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff. > > 2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be >pretty bossy. > > 3. They say she used to be nice. > > > > What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him? > > 1. His last name. > > 2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get >drunk on beer? > > 3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and >YES to chores? > > > > Why did your Mom marry your dad? > > 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a >lot. > > 2. She got too old to do anything else with him. > > 3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. > > > > Who's the boss at your house? > > 1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such >a goof ball. > > 2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under >the bed. > > 3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than >dad. > > > > What's the difference between moms and dads? > > 1. Moms work at work & work at home, & dads just go to work at >work. > > 2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. > > 3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power >'cause that's who you go to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. > > 4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. > > > > What does your Mom do in her spare time? > > 1. Mothers don't do spare time. > > 2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. > > > > What would it take to make your Mom perfect? > > 1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind >of plastic surgery. > > 2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue. > > > > If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be? > > 1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd >get rid of that. > > 2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister >who did it and not me. > > 3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the >back of her head. > > ******************************************** > > THE MOMMY TEST > > I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up >something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the >item away from her and I asked her not to do that. "Why?" my daughter >asked. "Because it's been laying outside, you don't know where it's been, >it's dirty and probably has germs" I replied. At this point, my daughter >looked at me with total admiration and asked, "Wow! How do you know all >this stuff?" "Uh," ...I was thinking quickly,"All moms know this stuff. >It's on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a >Mommy." We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was >evidently pondering this new information. "OH...I get it!" she beamed, "So >if you don't pass the test you have to be the daddy." "Exactly" I replied >back with a big smile on my face and joy in my heart. When you're finished >laughing, send this to a Mom. Too cute! > ********************************************* > > "Dear Lord," the preacher began with arms extended and a rapturous >look on his upturned face, "without you we are but dust..." He would have >continued, but at that moment one very obedient little girl (who was >listening carefully) leaned over to her mother and asked quite audibly in >her shrill little girl voice, "Mommy, WHAT is butt dust?" Church was pretty >much over at that point... Hope you enjoyed, Minnie |
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Title: Re: Why did God make Mothers? Post by Jasmyn on Feb 22nd, 2006, 4:24pm [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] Out of the mouths of babes ;) |
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Title: Yeah, I'm sure they asked all those... Post by Richr8 on Feb 22nd, 2006, 5:22pm ...questions and not one positive about Daddy. Little girls love their Daddy's. Cute :) Rich |
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