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        New Message Board Archives >> 2005 Funnies and Jokes >> 2004 Headlines
        
(Message started by: Jimmy B. on Oct 9^th, 2005, 11:40am)

Title: 2004 Headlines
Post by Jimmy B. on Oct 9^th, 2005, 11:40am

THE YEAR'S BEST [actual] HEADLINES OF 2004:

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers [Now that's taking things a bit far!]

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [What a guy!]

Miners Refuse to Work after Death [No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!]

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant [See if that works any better than a fair trial!]

War Dims Hope for Peace [I can see where it might have that effect!]

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile [You think?]

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures [Who would have thought!]

Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide [They may be on to something!]

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group [Weren't they fat enough?!]

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft [That's what he gets for eating those beans!]

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors [Boy, are they tall!]