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        New Message Board Archives >> 2005 Funnies and Jokes >> You can't do that!
        
(Message started by: bigAl on Apr 24^th, 2005, 7:43pm)

Title: You can't do that!
Post by bigAl on Apr 24^th, 2005, 7:43pm

Just a few jewels from someone else's legal research...

Alabama: Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.

Arizona: You may not have more than two dildos in a house.

Arkansas: A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.

California: Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

Colorado: It is illegal to mistreat rats in Denver.

Florida: You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.

Georgia: It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.

Illinois, Chicago: It is illegal to give a dog whiskey or to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb.

Indiana: A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.

Iowa: One-armed piano players must perform for free.

Kentucky, Lexington: By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."

Louisiana, New Orleans: You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.

Massachusetts: Bullets may not be used as currency.

Mississippi: It is illegal to sleep naked.

Nebraska: If a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested.

Nevada: It is still "legal" to hang someone for shooting your dog on your own property, but it is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.

New Hampshire: On Sundays citizens may not relieve themselves while looking up.

New Jersey: It is against the law to "frown" at a police officer.

New Mexico, Carrizozo: It is forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public.

New York: The penalty for jumping off a building is death.

North Carolina: All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with double beds that are at least two feet apart, making love in the space between the beds is strictly forbidden, and if a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married.

Ohio: It is illegal to get a fish drunk.

Oklahoma: Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.

Oregon: It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke it on your own property.

Pennsylvania: It is illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors, and you may not sing in the bathtub.

Rhode Island: Any marriage where either of the parties is an idiot or lunatic is null and void.

South Carolina: It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays, but it is illegal to communicate with a woman using obscene messages.

South Dakota: It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.

Tennessee: It is legal to gather and consume road kill.

Texas: It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.

Utah: A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.

West Virginia: No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions."

Wisconsin, Kenosha: No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public.

Wyoming: It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while drinking.

Title: Re: You can't do that!
Post by sandie99 on Apr 24^th, 2005, 8:06pm

[smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: You can't do that!
Post by Zephrah on Apr 25^th, 2005, 1:17pm

;;D i'll never live in Mississippi!