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        New Message Board Archives >> 2005 Funnies and Jokes >> Men Shopping ?
        
(Message started by: Redneck on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 6:44pm)

Title: Men Shopping ?
Post by Redneck on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 6:44pm

WIFE MART

A store that sells wives opens in Dallas, TX, where a man may go to
choose a wife from among MANY women. The store is comprised of 6 floors,
and the women increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch: As you open the door to any floor you may choose a wife from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building--no stopping on any lower floors.

A man goes to the shopping center to find a wife. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These women have jobs. The man reads the sign and says to himself, "Well, that's better than my last girlfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up he goes.

The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These women have jobs, love sports, and drink beer. The man smiles to himself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?"
The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These women have jobs, love sports, drink beer, and are extremely good looking. "Hmmm, better!" he says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"
The fourth floor sign reads:
Floor 4 - These women have jobs, love sports, drink beer, ar extremely good looking and do all the housework. "Wow!" exclaims the man, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more, much more, further up!" He heads up another flight.
The fifth floor sign reads:
Floor 5 - These women have jobs, love sports, drink beer, are
extremely good looking, do all the housework and don't bitch and gripe about anything.

"Hot Damn!..how close to perfect can you get?.. But just think...what must be awaiting me further on?" So up to the sixth floor he goes.
The sixth floor sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 133,956,779,012 to this floor. There
are no women on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that men are
impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping Wife Mart, and have a nice day.

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by ghost62 on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 6:52pm

shoot id settle for the 1st floor

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by Langa on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 6:54pm

One of the best I've read in a while...thanks! [smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by LeLimey on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 7:17pm

Thank you for my first laugh of Thursday [smiley=laugh.gif]
How do I get snot off my screen?

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by Langa on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 7:20pm

Helen, I could relate...windex worked pretty good... [smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by ghost62 on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 7:36pm

on 02/23/05 at 19:17:11, LeLimey wrote:

Thank you for my first laugh of Thursday [smiley=laugh.gif]
How do I get snot off my screen?

[smiley=spit.gif] [smiley=hurl.gif] [smiley=damncomputer.gif]

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by Redneck on Feb 23^rd, 2005, 10:20pm

:-[

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by sandie99 on Feb 24^th, 2005, 1:25am

[smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif]

And they say we're choosy.... ;;D

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by Frank_W on Feb 24^th, 2005, 9:13am

I'm still looking for the floor that has these kind of women:
"Doesn't hate sex."

Oh well...

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by vietvet2tours on Feb 24^th, 2005, 9:55am

After more failed marriages than I cared to admit my best friend told me I should just find a woman that hated me and buy her a house.

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by mynm156 on Feb 24^th, 2005, 4:45pm

I guess there R no perfect women :-[

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by Langa on Feb 24^th, 2005, 6:21pm

on 02/24/05 at 09:55:58, vietvet2tours wrote:

After more failed marriages than I cared to admit my best friend told me I should just find a woman that hated me and buy her a house.

Get rid of your friend... ;;D

Langa

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by AussieBrian on Feb 24^th, 2005, 10:52pm

Rather than just finding a woman you hate and buying her a house, find a woman with whom you can happily spend the rest of your life and marry one of her daughters.

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by Bethany1 on Feb 25^th, 2005, 10:58am

on 02/24/05 at 22:52:00, AussieBrian wrote:

marry one of her daughters.

[smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by vietvet2tours on Feb 28^th, 2005, 6:16pm

Not a woman I hate a woman that hates me.
on 02/24/05 at 22:52:00, AussieBrian wrote:

Rather than just finding a woman you hate and buying her a house, find a woman with whom you can happily spend the rest of your life and marry one of her daughters.

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by Jerry_b on Mar 2^nd, 2005, 2:31pm

on 02/23/05 at 19:17:11, LeLimey wrote:

Thank you for my first laugh of Thursday [smiley=laugh.gif]
How do I get snot off my screen?

Yu god id doo, huh? (sniff)

Title: Re: Men Shopping ?
Post by jokrs2 on Mar 2^nd, 2005, 6:45pm

[smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif]You all are making my day!!! [smiley=laugh.gif]