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Title: Tis that time of year... Post by Redd715 on Dec 6th, 2005, 10:43pm ...when everyone seems to reflect on the past...to dwell sometimes on the old rather than the new and whats in front of them. Seems I'm feeling some of that myself right now. With all the "memorial services" being held by the hospitals and cancer centers and the nursing home Mom was in I'm feeling overwhelmed by the expectation that I and my family should wallow in some sort of sorrow rather than celebrate Mom's freedom from the pain and the suffering she endured here in a physical body. I'm thankfull that she is free from the bonds of her physical state and can revel in total freedom from pain, from the confines of her wheelchair, free of the dimentia that plagued her mind for so long. I understand that these rituals are for the benefit of others who don't believe the same that Mom and I did. It's for those who have a bent for mourning the passing of a loved one than for being sad for a time then letting it go. Letting them go as nature intended. We all pass...it's inevitable. Acceptance of this fact makes it easier to deal with. Some pass less quitly than others and this is a shame. But it is the way it is. I do feel a bit upset that there is an expectation that we, her family, continue to mourn her escape from her hell. I miss you Mom, yes, but I'm more pleased that you are out of pain and suffering and we have talked about this before. We shall meet on the other plane, and walk together for a time till we are to part once more. I see you when you come to me. You wont let me forget our promise, and I won't... you trusted me to allow you to pass with peace and dignity. I thank you for your trust and I didn't betray it. |
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