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        New Message Board Archives >> 2005 General Board Posts >> Strong 'Old Bird
        
(Message started by: Redd715 on Sep 19^th, 2005, 9:36pm)

Title: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Redd715 on Sep 19^th, 2005, 9:36pm

Mom's vitals and everything else have, at this time taken an up turn. Though she is needing to be spoon fed, she is hungry and she is taking nourishment. Seems her kidneys have spontaniously started to work again. Right lung is still very congested and fluid filed but her hands and feet have lost the swelling and she's teally output alot of fuid over the last 48 hours to the point she is leaking the catheter and that is getting removed.

Both Her Primary Doc, (who was on a fishing vacation in Canada during all this) and I asked her if she ever wanted to go back to the hospital if she got sick again. She said no. So something inside her knows she doesn't want anything more done and to let nature take it's course, regardless of her dimentia.

We'll just have to wait and see now...

Doc said he wouldn't know what to do if his parents were in this spot. I asked him to make this fair....if he were the one laying in that bed, in the condition Mom is in, what would he want HIS kids to do...He said to let him go...

Said it's still hard when you think in those terms isn't it? Seperating the selfish wants from the duty that you are asked to perform. My charge is to fulfill Mom's wishes aside from my own desires or those of the rest of the family.

She knows (somehow I can't grasp how) that her time is coming and she wants it to be the couse of nature. No more BS no more hospitals no more prolonging the inevitable. What ever happens, happens now. Even in here state she confirmed her wishes. No more...no more...

Just going to test the kidney functions and a chest exray tomorrow for that right lung...no treatments....just a progress report. In a way I feel better just talking with her Primary Doc...but the selfish me wants Mom back...and whole..but she will never be whole again...and she wouldn't want to live this way.

Thanks for listening/reading....no replys needed this is just my way of getting it all out....

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by TomM on Sep 19^th, 2005, 9:40pm

Awe, Pegg. I feel your pain. :-[
My father contacted Hospice a few months back. A few strokes later and he's still with us mostly there but he has changed. I, too, find it hard to just sit back a wait for nature to take its course. I'm not sure if this is harder on us kids or him. He wants to go.... :'(
I feel your pain. :-*
TomM

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Charlie on Sep 19^th, 2005, 9:52pm

A tough time for everyone. All my thoughts are with you. http://www.smiley-sanctuary.com/smiley/amour/3/0079_G.gif?SSImageQuality=Full

I had a bit of an experience but nothing this hard on me. Wish I had more to say.

You're doing it right from where I sit.

Charlie

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by minnie on Sep 19^th, 2005, 9:59pm

((( Peggy ))) [smiley=hug.gif]
I wish you and your family strength and your Mom
peace that she so rightly deserves.
Minnie

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Jimi on Sep 19^th, 2005, 10:01pm

Thanks for the update Pegg. :-/

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by blossom on Sep 19^th, 2005, 10:09pm

Pegg-

I have been watching your posts. God, I feel horrible because I don't know what to say. Please just know I am thinking of you and your family and I have added you to a prayer chain. You are an incredibly strong woman and you will make it through this and come out even stronger.

:-* -
Karen

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by gMike on Sep 19^th, 2005, 10:16pm

Enjoy the good days and let her know she means a lot to you. It's very difficult to let someone go, but it sounds like that's what she wants.

If it is of any consolation, passing from failed kidneys is a relatively painfree and peaceful way to go. I spent a lot of time with the Father of a good friend as he passed from kidney failure. It was like a deeper and deeper sleep.

Stay strong and take care of yourself too.

Mike

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Redd715 on Sep 19^th, 2005, 10:34pm

Mom has phenonia, as well as the idney failure the somhow reverced itself...and a minor heart attack

As I said she is weak...she can't self feed, but her wil seems strong at this point. I think more it's a rebel against the authority of the Doc's.

We all know better than to quit Neurontin or Topomax cold turkey. Mom was taken off Dilantin, another of the anti seasure med's, cold turkey for six days after 15 years on it...no advere effects so far...( I never thought she needed it in the first place but thats a layman's opinion.)

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by nani on Sep 19^th, 2005, 10:42pm

This must be so hard for you, hun. :'(
[smiley=hug.gif]
hugs and love, nani

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Carl_D on Sep 20^th, 2005, 12:36am

Pegg, keeping you and your mom in prayer and hoping the situation gets better soon.

BIG [smiley=hug.gif]
Carl

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by LeLimey on Sep 20^th, 2005, 2:50am

Thinking of you constantly Pegg, thanks for the updates
lots of love
Helen x

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Redd715 on Sep 20^th, 2005, 5:48am

Well, just got done being woke up from a call from the home, her lungs are very congested again and they said she's asked for the morphine twice over night for the pain. They asked her again if she wanted to go back to the hospital and she said no. Calm before the storm I guess you could say. Left a message for Terry to call me back when he gets out of work. When Doc said last night she was looking better, I made plans to go back to work Wed, now I don't know what to do.

Back and forth and back and forth with this. Don't know who this is harder on, her or us as TomM said.

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by LeLimey on Sep 20^th, 2005, 6:22am

Pegg my love, people often rally before the end, its so tough knowing what to do as you can only live from hour to hour at the moment. [smiley=hug.gif]
See how today goes
lots and lots of love
Helen X

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Frank_W on Sep 20^th, 2005, 7:53am

[smiley=hug.gif]

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by Sandy_C on Sep 20^th, 2005, 8:40am

Take it one day at a time, Pegg. You are a strong bird, too.

Love to you and your family.

[smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=hug.gif]

Sandy

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by TomM on Sep 20^th, 2005, 10:20am

on 09/20/05 at 05:48:46, Redd715 wrote:

Back and forth and back and forth with this.

This is the beginning of the hardest part, for you. Stay in touch w/ loved ones, talk, and do not hold back the tears.
Nothing I write will take away the pain. Just know I understand. :-*
TomM

Title: Re: Strong 'Old Bird
Post by sandie99 on Sep 20^th, 2005, 1:39pm

(((((((((Pegg)))))))))

I've been thinking about you and your family a lot. [smiley=hug.gif]

I wish you all strength during this rough time. Thank you for letting us know how things are going. :)

Best wishes,
Sanna