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        New Message Board Archives >> 2005 General Board Posts >> Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
        
(Message started by: Redd715 on May 6th, 2005, 8:32am)
Title: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Redd715 on May 6th, 2005, 8:32am
Some may or may not remember, but last Sept my Mother had colon cancer and had a large prtion of her colon removed.  Well since Jan her counts and scans have all been steadily getting back to the scary end of the spectrums.  Today I will be spending the day at the imaging center and her oncologist for a full series gastro CT scan to see just how spread out the damage is both in her upper and lower GI tracks.  She has had GURD for many many years and there have been upper GI troubles as of late in addition to lower abdominal pain again.  The tumor counts have been steadily increasing, while the hemoglobinhas been dropping.  

Mom also suffers from a rare form of dementia and can no longer make decisions regarding her own health care.  Before the dimentia took over, she assigned me with durable power of attorney and she and went over what treatments she did and didn't want in her final days should she not be able to make those choices for herself.  She has been withering for a number of years now, and this new cancer scare on top of last fall has me wondering how much I can allow her body to be put through, or should I allow her her choice to just pass as PF as possible without repeated surgerys and/ or radiation etc.   You know...Quality over Quantity of life issues.  This is a sad time and stressful time for me and my family.  

Please keep all of us in your thoughts.

Thank you.
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by LeLimey on May 6th, 2005, 8:35am
Oh Redd I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. You are not alone though. We are always here and you can always let go  [smiley=hug.gif] Its such a hard choice. I don't envy you hon. I know you will do whats right though.
Loads of vibes coming your way. Hang in there
Love
Helen
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Carl_D on May 6th, 2005, 8:50am
I'm so sorry to hear this Redd. I'll say a prayer for you, your mom, and your family.

Hugs,
Carl D
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by vig on May 6th, 2005, 9:05am
I'm sorry Pegg.
Do your best. :'(
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Edna on May 6th, 2005, 9:11am
Pegg.......my thoughts and prayers with you and your family.

The key factor in your decisions............as you put it....  "should I allow her her choice"

Not for you to decide honey.....she already did when she relayed her wishes to you.

Although I'm sure it is quite tough...............I think you'll gather the strength from her when you need it.

Wishing you all the best when dealing with something so difficult and close at heart.

Keep us all posted here, we do care,

hugs,
EDNA
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by TxBasslady on May 6th, 2005, 9:15am
Pegg,

Lots of vibes....and prayers...for you, your Mom and family.

Keep us posted!

Jean
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Woobie on May 6th, 2005, 9:16am
[smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=hug.gif]
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by nani on May 6th, 2005, 9:24am
I'm sorry you're having to go through this, Pegg.  :'(
I'm sure it's very difficult for you. As Edna said, you have no decision to make, your Mom already made it. Be strong. You and your Mom are in my thoughts and prayers. hugs and love, nani  [smiley=hug.gif]
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Kim Y. on May 6th, 2005, 10:15am

Quote:
allow her her choice to just pass as PF as possible without repeated surgerys and/ or radiation etc.


I agree she has made this choice and you should honor her wishes.

I am so sorry this is happening.  You and your mom are in my thoughts and prayers. [smiley=hug.gif]
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts. you're
Post by LadyLuv on May 6th, 2005, 10:52am
Redd you're diffently in my Prayers... also your Mother and the rest of your family...[smiley=hug.gif]

When the time come for a decision I know that God can and God will help you to make the right one if you ask him...

Redd I had to make that decision 10 years ago.. And I have never had any regrets or second thoughts on what I decided.

So sweetie just allow God to guide you and everything will be okay..

Peace & Blessings
Luv & Prayers

Lady Luv  
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Gator on May 6th, 2005, 10:59am
You and your mom are in my thoughts.  I wish for you the strength to make the hard choices and the peace of mind to live with whatever choices you make.  I know it seems like an empty thing to say since we are all so far away, but you can lean on us for strength or at least for a shoulder to cry on.  You have phone numbers from many of us who care very much for you.  Use them if you need to.
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by kimmeesue on May 6th, 2005, 11:08am
God's peace and strength be with you and your mother at this difficult time.
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Karla on May 6th, 2005, 11:41am
I am so sorry that you are having to go through this.  I will be praying for you and your mother.  No matter what you do it wont' be easy.
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Tiannia on May 6th, 2005, 1:01pm
Pegg, you are both in my thoughts.  Light and Love on the way to you both.  When it is too much, close your eyes and feel the love of the Goddess around you.  Be strong my sister.  All you have to do is ask and take whatever energy you need.  

May your steps be guided by the Goddess. Blessed Be,
Tiannia
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by sandie99 on May 6th, 2005, 1:17pm
I'm so sorry... I'm praying for your whole family.  [smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=hug.gif] [smiley=hug.gif]

Best wishes,
Sandie
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by kissmyglass on May 6th, 2005, 1:22pm
My thoughts are with you & your mom Redd.

Kev
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Charlie on May 6th, 2005, 5:23pm
Sorry to learn of this and that you and your mom have been though such a rough time. I have to agree that she made the choices. You may have to make a choice too but I know you'll do the right thing.

All my thoughts and some vibes.

Charlie
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by medic1852 on May 6th, 2005, 5:44pm
Redd, dont really know you baby doll, but I hate cancer with a passion I have lost family members to it as well, I participate in the yearly relay for life for the american cancer society. Well enough of that. I pray for anyone who has the threat or actual cancer. So your mother is in my prayers tonight and my thoughts until this is resolved. I will tell my freinds and family members to mention her as well. Bless you and yours....
Rodger :-X [smiley=hewey.gif] [smiley=hug.gif]
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Ronny on May 6th, 2005, 5:51pm
Damn.

[smiley=hug.gif]
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Redd715 on May 6th, 2005, 5:59pm
Thank you all for thoughts and well wishes.  The time comes when the CHild becaomes the parent and the parent the child.  The rolls get switched.  Sometimes more ovious than at other times.  No final results are in yet, however the reality of the situation dawned on me today by a circumstance that on one hand made me want to break into tears and on the other made me grin from ear to ear.  It's not a pretty thing, but it did, for some reason make it all come so *full circle* for me.

Mom has not had control over her bladder and bowel functions for some years.  This morning after the CT I was helping the nurse there get Mom off the bench and back to her wheelchair and there was a mess all over the place, out the back of her pants, through the material and onto the bench and down her leg.  It took myself and two nurses, one to hold Mom standing up as she has no use of her legs, in a small bathroom, and the other nurse and I to wipe her clean.  (No easy task when it comes to barium)  It dawned on me that I was changing the diaper of the woman who had changed so many of mine for two years.  

Full circle indeed.
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Redneck on May 6th, 2005, 6:20pm
Hugs for you both, I know how hard this is. Here if you need anything, even just someone to scream at.
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Jonny on May 6th, 2005, 7:22pm
:'( :-*
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Ree on May 6th, 2005, 7:24pm
Prayers and thoughts to comfort you and your family are going out tonight...... with love ree
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by BlueMeanie on May 6th, 2005, 10:29pm
Hugs and prayers Redd.  :(
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by ShariRae on May 6th, 2005, 10:33pm
I am so sorry that you & Mom are going through this.Strength, hugs ,vibes & prayers to you & your family.We are here if you need anything...
Much Love
Shari
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Sean_C on May 6th, 2005, 10:44pm
Mega prayers going to you and your family Pegg.

[smiley=hug.gif]

Sean.................
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Opus on May 6th, 2005, 11:55pm
(((((Pegg)))))

Opus/Paul
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by E-Double on May 7th, 2005, 12:06am
[smiley=hug.gif]
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Bethany1 on May 7th, 2005, 4:50pm
Prayers to you and your family Pegg.  [smiley=hug.gif]

Beth
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Leesa on May 8th, 2005, 3:10pm
Consider it done sis!!!! Its never easy BTDT. Here if you need us hun.
Love, Dave and Leesa
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Cathi04 on May 8th, 2005, 10:38pm
Pegg, Your mom is in hands bigger than ours....sending up vibes and well-wishes that she will be out of this trouble soon.
Please remember, miracles have happened here before.......hang onto hope, ok?????

If ya start to fall, there's a big crowd here to catch you.

Cathi

Oh, and Pegg.... We are called the SANDWICH generation....right between our children and our parents. Not an easy place to be, but it is nice to know we can give back to our parents...and, umm, our kids?? Well, you know what they say about payback! ;)
Hang tight girl, this too shall pass....
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Lizzie2 on May 9th, 2005, 1:18am
Pegg,

Many many prayers and vibes to you and your mother.

I think one of the greatest "gifts" we can give our loved ones is to have our wishes known ahead of time.  Although it still isn't easy, she has relieved you from having to go through the dilemmas of making the choices (on some level).  

Please let me know if you need anything...even if it's just a shoulder to cry on for a little while.

Much love,
Lizzie2/Carrie
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by ZAIRA on May 9th, 2005, 2:42am

:'( I'm sorry Pegg... prayers already out...  Please check in when you can to let us know how things are going.

Love, Zaira
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by lionsound on May 9th, 2005, 4:40pm
thinking of you and your mom     [smiley=hug.gif]

-lionsound
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by broomhilda on May 9th, 2005, 5:01pm
[smiley=hug.gif]Thinking of all of you...
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Grandma_Sweet_Boy on May 9th, 2005, 5:11pm
You're so right Pegg - life does indeed take us full circle.

Sure is a tough spot for you to be in right now.  Hang in there girl.

Hugs
Carol
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts. (update)
Post by Redd715 on May 9th, 2005, 7:52pm
Update....

The results are in and thank the powers that be it was not another round of cancer surgery ahead.  The CT scan was fine for all of that, but there was some shadows around the kidneys that they were certain was bleeding (hence the pain in her abdomen) and they ran a urine screen and she had blood and high white count in the urine.  

Since she is unable to sence the need to have movements, she is also surely unaware of any burning with urination, so it turned out she had a very advanced infection.  Lucky her kidneys hadn't shut down all together.

Whew...that is a real relief for now.  What else may come will come, but she dodged the bullet this go-round.

Thanks everyone.  The power of positive thought and energy is a wonderous thing.
Title: Re: Please keep my Mom in your thoughts.
Post by Candycane on May 9th, 2005, 7:57pm
May you just feel all this support and comfort that is all around here. And hope it helps in the hard days to come.

Many thoughts and prayers are with you now when you need them

God Bless
Candy


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