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        New Message Board Archives >> 2005 General Board Posts >> Definition of a redneck needed
        
(Message started by: sandie99 on Feb 18^th, 2005, 3:47am)

Title: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by sandie99 on Feb 18^th, 2005, 3:47am

I tried to explain to a friend of mine what "redneck" means last night. I don't think I did that good job, though. So, help me out here! How would you explain what a redneck is to someone who has no idea?

Thanks,
Sandie

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Donna_D. on Feb 18^th, 2005, 6:05am

You might be a Redneck if…

Your dog eats more then you do.

You go only once a month to town to do your laundry.

Your video library consists only of every episode of The Dukes Of Hazzard and every episode of Hee-Haw.

You've ever wore a pair of cowboy boots to a formal party.

You feel naked if you leave the house without your cowboy hat.

It's Saturday night and your biggest decision is the bar or your best friend's wedding-You chose the bar.

Most of your Christmas presents came from a truck stop.

The rest of your Christmas presents came from Goodwill.

Your town has more cows than people living in it.

Most of your dishes and silverware came from restaurants (and you didn't buy them).

You've ever been arrested on obscenity charges because you wore your favorite t-shirt out in public.

When you move your house moves with you.

You walk in your front door and you are in your back yard.

You drive around in a red ford f 150 jacked up on big wheels with a rebel flag in the back.

You carry your guns around with you everywhere you go.

The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.

You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, watch this!"

You've got more than one brother named, "Darryl."

Your Junior/Senior Prom had a day care.

You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are, "Gentlemen, start your engines."

You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.

Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there's a law against it.

You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Sean_C on Feb 18^th, 2005, 6:52am

the matching set of salad bowls say COOL WHIP on them ;;D

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by hilbily on Feb 18^th, 2005, 8:32am

If this is at the top of your Christmas tree
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v629/gahilbily/ca80cfef.jpg

You might be a redneck!

Jim

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Hirvimaki on Feb 18^th, 2005, 9:09am

A redneck is a stereotypical southern United States socially conservative, rural, working class white person of northern European ancestry.

The term can be used both as a pejorative or as a matter of pride (like your hero, Gretchen Wilson).

Hirvimaki-Isi

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Sylvan on Feb 18^th, 2005, 9:42am

If your wife's ever said "honey - could you move this transmission - i wanna take a bath"

If you've ever mown your lawn and found more than 3 cars.

If strangers stop at your house regularly and ask if you're having a yard sale.

If you're wife's ever had her hair-do destroyed by a ceiling fan.

If you've ever had to repaint a water tower to defend your sister's honor.

If you think a family reunion is a great place to pick up chicks.

You think Possum is "the other white meat"

Your front porch collapses and 4 dogs get killed.

Your family tree has no forks.

You owe 1/2 of your annual income to the taxidermist.

You have to go outside to get something outta the 'fridge.

Your idea of quality entertainment is a 6-pack and a bug zapper.

http://www.looniebin-of-jokes.com/pics/typvirg.jpg

(BTW - i just added Gretchen Wilson's little ditty as a ringer on my phone to annoy my BF who lived most of his lilfe in Missouri) ::)

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Donna_D. on Feb 18^th, 2005, 10:09am

on 02/18/05 at 09:09:28, Hirvimaki wrote:

If this made no sense to you....

You might be a redneck!!! [smiley=laugh.gif]

DD

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Sean_C on Feb 18^th, 2005, 10:18am

LMAO Cooty gave us this one ;;D

http://www.toonedin.com/movies/WhiteTrashXmas.html

Sean....................... ;;D

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Kevin_M on Feb 18^th, 2005, 10:40am

on 02/18/05 at 09:09:28, Hirvimaki wrote:

A redneck is a stereotypical southern United States

Ya'll ain't a bin ta upper Mishgin I kin tayell.

*some of them redneck descriptions were real killers ;;D

Kevin M

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by john_d on Feb 18^th, 2005, 10:44am

Yep, I used to think it was just a southern thing too until I start travelling alot. It definitely isn't, lol. ;;D

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Hirvimaki on Feb 18^th, 2005, 12:00pm

on 02/18/05 at 10:44:31, john_d wrote:

Yep, I used to think it was just a southern thing too until I start travelling alot. It definitely isn't, lol. ;;D

She asked what "redneck" means. I'm sorry for actually supplying what was asked. Good grief. [smiley=moonwiggle.gif]

Hirvimaki

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by nani on Feb 18^th, 2005, 12:05pm

My first husband. :-/

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Langa on Feb 18^th, 2005, 12:10pm

on 02/18/05 at 12:05:47, nani wrote:

My first husband. :-/

[smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Tiannia on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:09pm

Tell them to rent a Jeff Foxworth comic tape. That will give them a good idea dn make them laugh at the same time.

Smile Hirv. You are too litteral for this group sometimes. :-*

Love ya
-Tia

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Hirvimaki on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:16pm

on 02/18/05 at 13:09:42, Tiannia wrote:

Smile Hirv. You are too litteral for this group sometimes. :-*

It is called Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD) - not to be confused with OCD. And I make no apologies for it! ;)

Hirvimaki-Isi

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by broomhilda on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:18pm

I always thought you could just watch Jerry Springer and see Rednecks? ::)

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Tiannia on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:20pm

on 02/18/05 at 13:18:38, broomhilda wrote:

I always thought you could just watch Jerry Springer and see Rednecks? ::)

hehe thought for years that my hubby's ex would call Springer when we first got together. She swore to people at college (I was graduated but still had friends there) that I put a spell on him to make him leave her.

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Hirvimaki on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:24pm

on 02/18/05 at 13:18:38, broomhilda wrote:

I always thought you could just watch Jerry Springer and see Rednecks? ::)

Don't confuse "redneck" and "white trash". Although the two are not mutually exclusive, they are not one and the same.

Hirvimaki-Isi

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by sandie99 on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:27pm

Thanks, guys! Now I don't have to explain my friend.... I'll just show her all these!

And by the way, Gretchen Wilson isn't my hero... I love her music, though. ;)

PFdays to all,
Sandie

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by E-Double on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:38pm

www.mytrailerpark.com

Could be a redneck [smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by broomhilda on Feb 18^th, 2005, 1:52pm

on 02/18/05 at 13:38:48, E-Double wrote:

www.mytrailerpark.com

Could be a redneck [smiley=laugh.gif]

LMFAO Eric [smiley=laugh.gif] Thats too funny, thanks!!!

ps- Trailer Park Boys rule ;;D

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Margi on Feb 18^th, 2005, 2:00pm

on 02/18/05 at 13:52:32, broomhilda wrote:

LMFAO Eric [smiley=laugh.gif] Thats too funny, thanks!!!

ps- Trailer Park Boys rule ;;D

especially Bubbles ;)

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by BobG on Feb 18^th, 2005, 2:02pm

on 02/18/05 at 13:38:48, E-Double wrote:

www.mytrailerpark.com

Could be a redneck [smiley=laugh.gif]

Now THAT was funny! [smiley=laugh.gif]

I even clicked on the pictures and got some T-shirts. ::)

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by sandie99 on Feb 18^th, 2005, 2:12pm

That website's got to be a joke... ;;D

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Leesa on Feb 18^th, 2005, 2:20pm

If the directions to your trailer include the words "turn off the paved road." You might be a red neck! And I am a redneck cuz you DO turn off the paved road to get to my house!! LMAO
Redneck, Leesa ;;D

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by sandie99 on Feb 18^th, 2005, 2:25pm

Redneck Woman (Gretchen Wilson song)

Well, I ain't never been the Barbie doll type
No, I can't swig that sweet Champagne, I'd rather drink beer all night
In a tavern or in a honky tonk or on a four-wheel drive tailgate
I've got posters on my wall of Skynyrd, Kid and Strait
Some people look down on me, but I don't give a rip
I'll stand barefooted in my own front yard with a baby on my hip

'Cause I'm a redneck woman
I ain't no high class broad
I'm just a product of my raising
I say, 'hey ya'll' and 'yee-haw'
And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long
And I know all the words to every Charlie Daniels song
So here's to all my sisters out there keeping it country
Let me get a big 'hell yeah' from the redneck girls like me, hell yeah

Victoria's Secret, well their stuff's real nice
But I can buy the same damn thing on a Wal-Mart shelf half price
And still look sexy, just as sexy as those models on TV
I don't need no designer tag to make my man want me
Well, you might think I'm trashy, a little too hardcore
But in my neck of the woods I'm just the girl next door

I'm a redneck woman
I ain't no high class broad
I'm just a product of my raising
I say, 'hey y'all' and 'yee-haw'
And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long
And I know all the words to every Tanya Tucker song
So here's to all my sisters out there keeping it country
Let me get a big 'hell yeah' from the redneck girls like me, hell yeah

I'm a redneck woman
I ain't no high class broad
I'm just a product of my raising
I say, 'hey y'all' and 'yee-haw'
And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long
And I know all the words to every ol' Bocephus song
So here's to all my sisters out there keeping it country
Let me get a big 'hell yeah' from the redneck girls like me, hell yeah
Hell yeah, hell yeah
Hell yeah
I said hell yeah!

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by E-Double on Feb 18^th, 2005, 2:27pm

on 02/18/05 at 14:20:26, Leesa wrote:

Maybe but you're hubby ain't yo daydee nor is he yo grampy nor do yo share a Mammy ;;D

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Sylvan on Feb 18^th, 2005, 2:29pm

on 02/18/05 at 14:20:26, Leesa wrote:

And I am a redneck cuz you DO turn off the paved road to get to my house!! LMAO
Redneck, Leesa ;;D

Me too by that definition!

But Leesa - i think the operative word here that disqualifies us is HOUSE (not Trailer)

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by buckeyescooter on Feb 18^th, 2005, 3:00pm

If you're too drunk to go fishing.

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Jonny on Feb 18^th, 2005, 3:16pm

Ever see a Redneck water ski? ;;D

http://spassfelge.de/images/spassfelgewebdown.mpg

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Redneck on Feb 18^th, 2005, 6:25pm

All yew had to dew lil' darlin wuz axe me ;;D

http://www.redneckworld.com/

http://www.useless-knowledge.com/articles/093.html

Edit, I ain't lost the touch, I can kill a thread quicker than you can shoot a snakes head off. :-X

Title: Re: Definition of a redneck needed
Post by Charlie on Feb 19^th, 2005, 3:40am

Gun rack in a Volvo.

Charlie