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        New Message Board Archives >> 2004 Posts >> I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
        
(Message started by: Tiannia on Dec 14^th, 2004, 10:43am)

Title: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Tiannia on Dec 14^th, 2004, 10:43am

This is the sencond year now that my CH has ramped up right at Christams (as it does other times of the year as well). But right now I am getting a minimum of 6 K7 or higher right now. It is so hard with the kids because I dont want them to remember Christmas as a time when mom was in pain all the fucking time.

Sorry just needed somewhere to vent my frustration. This is the part that makes me feel like I'm an awful mother and there is not s fucking thing I can do about it. :'(

I pray that you all are PF. Blessed Yule my friends,
-Tia

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by taraann on Dec 14^th, 2004, 10:51am

Aww Tianna. I totally know where you are coming from. I don't want my kids to look back and remember mom ALWAYS saying just wait a little bit for this or that cause mommy has a headache. I don't have much advice hun except keep hanging in there, keep searching for what works for you so maybe someday you can look back at this as a distant memory.

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by nani on Dec 14^th, 2004, 12:01pm

I'm sorry you're going through so much now, Tia.I forgot how old your kids are. Take advantage of one of those PF moments and sit down w/ the little ones and explain what's going on. Tell them that you don't want this to mess with their lives, too. Most kids are more resilient than we think. Use the PF times to sing carols, tell Christmas stories, etc. Kids are easy to distract and it's important to try and distract yourself from your nightmare every now and then. Do it for you, too. The best parents are ones who strive to do the best they can...there are no perfect parents. You do your best and that's what counts. [smiley=hug.gif]

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Tiannia on Dec 14^th, 2004, 12:15pm

Nani, My kids are 7 and 2. Shara (my olderst) does understand that it is my head and not her. But I know that at times it really scares Cameron. It is just so very hard.

Thanks Nani and Taraann.

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Jeepgun on Dec 14^th, 2004, 12:55pm

I'm so sorry, Tianna. I'm fortunate that my daughter has never had to witness me getting hit. If I feel one coming on during the day, I can go into another room. When I get hit at night, she's asleep. The ones that happen at night are the ones that really have the potential to turn me into a headbanging madman. I hope she never wakes up and sees that... :(

If you feel one coming on, why not pretend that you have to go to the bathroom or something, excuse yourself, and then come back when it's done?

My best to you and yours, and wishes for happy holidays,
-Frank

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Ree on Dec 14^th, 2004, 1:53pm

Sorry T... Its so hard to be merry and celebrate and enjoy when the beast is hard at your head... We have had a few bad and not so merry Christmas' due to the beast also... Keep keepin on... and remember they will remember how strong you are and be thankful for the non painful times......... positive thoughts... Blessed Yule to you too friend.........ree

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Hirvimaki on Dec 14^th, 2004, 2:00pm

Warm and fuzzy PF vibes to ya, hon. Hang in there. I know how you are feeling. I thought it was hard with my wife seeing me in pain, but with Kaisa-Tinuviel I'm scared with how she will react. But that's why we have this family, no?

((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

Hirvimaki-Isi

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by nancyc on Dec 14^th, 2004, 3:31pm

Sorry T and everyone out there suffering rite now...My son can tell you that it was hard for him when he was younger..but that was before Imitrex came out...Thank God we do have a reprieve now....Know you all are in my thoughts and prayers...Noone should suffer at Christmas from chs, in fact, noone should have to suffer these damn things period! Maybe one day, there will be an answer for us. :)nancyc ps a special Christmas hug for all the kids whose parents have to deal with chs...They need to know that we love them here at ch.com....We are one big family and that includes all of our family members that suffer along with us.

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by lionsound on Dec 14^th, 2004, 3:56pm

Tianna,
My kids(10 and 6) have seen me be in pain a lot, even in the ER... ever since they can remember. It is very hard.

you are a great mother and a wonderful person. Even though the beast may attacking you...it is in no way the you inside!!!! Your kids know that. Even the little one. They love you!!!!

Be well and PF,
lionsound

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Tiannia on Dec 14^th, 2004, 5:01pm

Thanks all. It helps to hear you all. It is nice to know that I am not the only one who thinks about this.

Jeep, It is hard to excuse yourself, when you are the one taking care fo the kids. I cant exactly lock myself in a room and wait for it to stop. Especially whe the trex does not help (like I got hit Sunday. Trex would not abort it. Scared the fuck out of me, cause I dont know what I would do if that stopped helping.

I try so hard to be strong, but it is hard when they hear me crying and screaming into a pillow because of the pain. All I can do it give thema hug after wards and hope that they know how much I love them.
:'(
-Tia

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Jeepgun on Dec 14^th, 2004, 5:22pm

:'( I'm so sorry, Tia. It's truly a shame that the beast has no sense of decorum or reverence for special days... One of my worst hits ever, my wife and I were out for dinner on our anniversary. I absolutely HAD to pace, so I excused myself and went for a brisk, 15-minute walk, and came back with my eye looking like I'd gone a couple of rounds with Lennox Lewis. Real romantic... :P >:(

Hang in there... I'd spare you a thought if I could, but the last one I had died of loneliness. ;)

Seriously, though: You are in my thoughts and prayers, and I wish you and your family the best holiday ever! [smiley=hug.gif]

-Frank

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Mac_Muz on Dec 14^th, 2004, 5:34pm

Ouch! trex didn't work??? Thats bad.. me too sorry to read of it, and for you... Mac

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by LeLimey on Dec 14^th, 2004, 5:35pm

I liked a suggestion Nani came up with a while back about giving the kids colouring pens and paper and getting them to draw how they see you and how they feel.. maybe get them to draw their inventions of how to "trap" the beast or scare him away..
I do know how you feel though, its awful to have your kids see you in pain. Us parents are supposed to be invincible in kids eyes and when we aren't they feel very vulnerable. Giving them the chance to use their imagination to get rid of the beast might help.. I hope so [smiley=hug.gif]

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Tiannia on Dec 14^th, 2004, 6:19pm

on 12/14/04 at 17:35:40, LeLimey wrote:

I liked a suggestion Nani came up with a while back about giving the kids colouring pens and paper and getting them to draw how they see you and how they feel.. maybe get them to draw their inventions of how to "trap" the beast or scare him away..
Giving them the chance to use their imagination to get rid of the beast might help.. I hope so [smiley=hug.gif]

That is a good idea. Think it really might be good for my 7 yr old cause I think there are times when she holds it in. She will come up and put her hand on my head and ask the God and Goddess to make it better. And you know that even makes me cry harder.

Fuck here come the sweats to about to get hit again. Fuck... Fuck .... Fuck....

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by LeLimey on Dec 14^th, 2004, 6:22pm

Take care Tia, I'm so sorry you are hurting and I wish there was something I could do to help

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by taraann on Dec 14^th, 2004, 7:18pm

My daughter likes to have ice like me. I always have to make an extra bag or frozen washcloth for her too. Breaks my heart a little. But she thinks she is the coolest with her ice lol. Just thought I'd throw that one out there for ya.

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by broomhilda on Dec 14^th, 2004, 9:24pm

:'(I know how you feel Tia, my little one is almost seven breaks my heart.... [smiley=hug.gif]

Thinking of you and your family....

Title: Re: I need your thoughts, if you can spare some
Post by Grandma_Sweet_Boy on Dec 14^th, 2004, 9:39pm

Sorry to hear this Tia - I know it's rough with little ones -maybe Santa could bring you a PF time!

Hugs to you
Carol