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        New Message Board Archives >> 2004 Posts >> Subject:   Hell
        
(Message started by: Redd715 on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:35pm)

Title: Subject: Hell
Post by Redd715 on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:35pm

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet,
which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until
all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and
has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine
being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A".

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by john_d on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:38pm

lmao Redd!!! [smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by broomhilda on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:40pm

[smiley=laugh.gif]LMFAO!

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by nani on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:49pm

[smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Cerberus on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:49pm

right....

If love is blind and God is love then Ray Charles must be God...in which case we have already seen the second coming and the end is certainly near.

Just a "Theory" ;)

Ramon

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Redneck on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:55pm

Thats a helluva note!
[smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by cschick on Dec 9^th, 2004, 9:59pm

[smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Sean_C on Dec 9^th, 2004, 10:02pm

[smiley=crackup.gif]

Sean............................

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Gator on Dec 10^th, 2004, 10:18am

[smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Jeepgun on Dec 10^th, 2004, 10:27am

Hee hee... Creative guy! I would have given him an A too! LOL! (and a big fat THUMBS-UP!) [smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by ArCane on Dec 10^th, 2004, 12:56pm

[smiley=crackup.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Tiannia on Dec 10^th, 2004, 1:07pm

Sounds like something I woul dhave done in college. Hell the Educations majors thought that I was sent to drive them insane when I had to take my capstone class my senior year (upper level class outside my major for that well rounded education) and I took an Education class. Thought at one point I was going to end up tarred and feathered cause I was always fucking with thier theorys.

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by notseinfeld on Dec 10^th, 2004, 4:18pm

Ab-Fab Redd. Sankya!

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Hirvimaki on Dec 10^th, 2004, 4:46pm

Funny stuff! And one of my favorites. It is a clever follow-up on "HEAVEN IS HOTTER THAN HELL" and "A REFUTATION OF THE PROOF THAT HEAVEN IS HOTTER THAN HELL".

If you don't find scientific humour funny, skip past this post.

HEAVEN IS HOTTER THAN HELL
The temperature of heaven can be rather accurately computed. Our authority is the Bible, Isaiah 30:26 reads, Moreover, the light of the moon shall be as the light of the sun and the light of the sun shall be sevenfold as the light of seven days. Thus, heaven receives from the moon as much radiation as the earth does from the sun, and in addition seven times seven (forty nine) times as much as the earth does from the sun, or fifty times in all. The light we receive from the moon is one ten-thousandth of the light we receive from the sun, so we can ignore that. With these data we can compute the temperature of heaven: The radiation falling on heaven will heat it to the point where the heat lost by radiation is just equal to the heat received by radiation. In other words, heaven loses fifty times as much heat as the earth by radiation. Using the Stefan-Boltzmann fourth power law for radiation

(H/E)⁴ = 50

where E is the absolute temperature of the earth, 300°K (273+27). This gives H the absolute temperature of heaven, as 798° absolute (525°C).

The exact temperature of hell cannot be computed but it must be less than 444.6°C, the temperature at which brimstone or sulfur changes from a liquid to a gas. Revelations 21:8: But the fearful and unbelieving... shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone." A lake of molten brimstone [sulfur] means that its temperature must be at or below the boiling point, which is 444.6°C. (Above that point, it would be a vapor, not a lake.)

We have then, temperature of heaven, 525°C (977°F). Temperature of hell, less than 445°F). Therefore heaven is hotter than hell.

[Note: The author of this piece of humor is unknown, but originally appeared in Applied Optics with the following prefaced "The following reached your Managing Editor via John Howard (from) H. William Koch (from) Alan Bromley (from) an unnamed environmenetal physicist of several decades back." This places its origin as early as 1950.]

Hirvimaki-Isi

Title: Re: Subject: Hell
Post by Hirvimaki on Dec 10^th, 2004, 4:48pm

Again, if you don't find scientific humour funny, skip past this post.

A REFUTATION OF THE PROOF THAT HEAVEN IS HOTTER THAN HELL
Dr. Tim Healey, F. R. C. R.; M. I. Nuc. E.

In Applied Optics (1972, 11 A14) there appeared a calculation of the respective temperatures of Heaven and Hell. That of Heaven was computed by substituting the values given in Isaiah 30 26 in the Stefan-Boltzman radiation law, so that (H/E)⁴ = 50, where E, the absolute temperature of the Earth, is 300ºK, whence the temperature of Heaven, H, is 798ºK or 525ºC. This is hard to find fault with.

The assessment of the temperature of Hell stands, I suggest, on less firm ground. As authority we use the data provided in Revelations 21 8, so that the temperature of Hell seems to be 444.6ºC – the temperature at which liquid sulfur is in equilibrium with its vapour – a temperature indeed which is sufficiently reliable to be used in the secondary calibration of pyrometers.

Now this last reckoning fails to follow the argument through. 444.6ºC is the temperature at which liquid sulfur is in equilibrium with its vapour at normal atmospheric pressure. Have we any data as to the pressure likely to be found in Hell?

The answer is "Yes". A nineteenth century mathematician has already provided the groundwork for us and we may feel confident that by the year 2000 the total number of the damned will be at least 29,422,641,251,519,917,000 souls. Yet the area of the valley of Gehinnom is only 7,000,000 square meters.

We can now apply these figures in the Ideal Gas Equation to calculate what the pressure will be in the valley of Gehinnom. Since surely some souls must have been damned since 1877, the pressure can only have increased since these calculations were made and the equilibrium point on the phase diagram of sulfur must have shifted still further, so that if we can show that at a temperature of 525ºC sulfur would still be liquid at the pressure calculated (which is a minimum value, remember). Hell (Gehinnom) is now cooler than Heaven.

Certain corrections must be applied first, however.

1. Neiht based his calculation on a date of creation of 1658 + 2326 - 1877 = 2107 BC (minimum). Counting generations in the Bible gives a date for the Creation of 4004 BC. However, atomic dating has shown that Olduvai man is at least 2 × 106 years old.

2. We should use a Fibonacci series for the expansion, not a simple doubling series. The ancient Jewish laws against inbreeding also act in the same direction.

3. By a fortunate coincidence, the effects of 1 and 2 cancel each other exactly.

4. The human body is not an ideal gas, but

5. A good deal of it is gaseous at 525ºC, and in any case,

6. It could well be that at very great pressures the external pressure may well exceed the pressure of electromagnetic repulsion, when different "gas" laws would apply. This merely explains how the Lord works in fitting so large a number of damned souls into so small a space and it need not be quantitative.

In the calculation the following assumptions are made:

1. The average height can be taken as one meter. This seems a fair figure between the newborn babe and the fullgrown man.

2. The average space needed is about 30 cm × 20 cm. It seems unlikely that any closer packing could be achieved. Neiht uses a figure of 1/20 cubic meters per person, which is nearly identical with my independent assessment. Mine allows a neat cancellation, later.

3. I have assumed that not more than two layers of damned persons can be accommodated, since otherwise those in the middle layers would escape the full rigours of Hell.

So that,

The volume available in Gehenna is 60 × 106 × 2 m3 and

The original volume of the damned is 0.06 × 29.422641 × 1018m3

Then, at constant temperature (which we assume, taking equilibrium)

P1V1 = P2V2 or P2 = P1V1/V2

Substituting,

P2 = [29 × 6 × 1016] / [2 × 6 × 107] = 14.5 × 109 atmospheres

(1)

Now let us see what pressure is needed to liquefy sulfur vapour at 525ºC.

We have, using the Clausius-Cleypeyron equation in its integrated form,

Log P = 7.43287 - 3268.2 / T

where P = pressure in mm Hg

and T = the elevated boiling point in ºK,

so that

Log P = 7.43287 - (3268.2/798 ) = 3.3373813

whence,

P = 2174.607 mm Hg = 2.86 atmospheres

(2)

(1) is so much greater than (2) that Revelations 21 8 indicates a temperature very considerably higher than 525ºC.

Thus, Hell is hotter than Heaven (which remains deucedly hot).

[Note: This paper appeared in The Journal of Irreproducible Results in 1979.]

Hirvimaki-Isi