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        New Message Board Archives >> 2004 Posts >> I have a new cure
        
(Message started by: WhoIsTedNow on Dec 8^th, 2004, 10:38pm)

Title: I have a new cure
Post by WhoIsTedNow on Dec 8^th, 2004, 10:38pm

And you'd be a sucker not to pay me for it.
If you want pain relief you need to take some sausage powder, granulated mink fur, Baby harp seal meat freshly clubbed and cooked rare, and a bible to scream ridiculous interpretations from, like Jesus is God and if you don't believe me you're going to hell! Then take some smoke sauce and add it to.... Ohhhh, that's what I have to get paid for. No secrets divulged for free. But it worked for me. Want the cure? Aks me!

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by cschick on Dec 8^th, 2004, 10:40pm

who the fuck is this guy? OH JONNY AND THE LADIES WITH THE BIG SHARP STICKS - IT'S BARBEQUE TIME!!!!!!

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by nani on Dec 8^th, 2004, 10:47pm

I'm gonna give it away- my recipe was missing the harp seal part. Add a pinch of ground rocky mountain oysters and boil for 5 minutes. Add 1/4 oz of 'shrooms and drink up... ;;D
And who is Ted now?
That'll be $49.95 .... ;;D

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Kevin_M on Dec 8^th, 2004, 10:51pm

on 12/08/04 at 22:38:20, WhoIsTedNow wrote:

No secrets divulged for free.

Well, divulging this secret for free makes "free" look too expensive for me. Shouldn't you pay people for your presence and company or are you just trying to see what attention you can get for free. Free attention for you is too expensive for me, you'll have to pay me to even give a sh!t.

Quote:

And you'd be a sucker not to pay me for it.

Kevin M

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by thebbz on Dec 8^th, 2004, 11:01pm

OK I'm supid. What is it and how much does it cost? [smiley=huh.gif]
The oysters don't sound to bad though. :P I miss them off the branding fire.
bb

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by JDH on Dec 8^th, 2004, 11:10pm

Now where in the hell am I gonna find some baby harp seal meat freshly clubbed and cooked rare here in the midwest?

Jim

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Mr. Happy on Dec 8^th, 2004, 11:11pm

Ahh.Teddy boy. Is it really you? In spite of your miserable attempt at left wing humor, we still demand a DNA test to make sure it's NOT you.

I heard you was dead,
RJ

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by WhoIsTedNow on Dec 9^th, 2004, 12:05am

Shhh Mr Happy. I'll cut you in on half the money. You get it all if the tests prove me dead.

And that doesn't count for the things that could never revive anyone.

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by WhoIsTedNow on Dec 9^th, 2004, 12:20am

Jonny and the ladies with the big sharp sticks? Now if that doesn't sound like a transvestite band!

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by cathy on Dec 9^th, 2004, 12:32am

Ted I only do small blunt twigs if that helps ;)

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by WhoIsTedNow on Dec 9^th, 2004, 12:39am

It probably helps the small blunt twigs. :-0

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by BarbaraD on Dec 9^th, 2004, 6:39am

Hi Ted -- missed you. Wondered when you'd come up with the "cure". I know darling, you've been knee deep in "research" on this new recipe. Keep up the good work.

Hugs BD

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by don on Dec 9^th, 2004, 7:30am

Someone told me the guy on the grassy knoll got you. guess not.

You better hope he is not a Baptist that is a member ingood standing with PETA.

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Not4Hire on Dec 9^th, 2004, 7:40am

...uh, is there a vegetarian version? For mormons?

And can I use PayPal?

(and WTF is DNA...... [smiley=huh.gif] )

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by don on Dec 9^th, 2004, 7:45am

Quote:

and WTF is DNA

The stuff in Chinese food.

Will give you a Meegraine.

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by john_d on Dec 9^th, 2004, 8:25am

I remember Ted's last posts, they were disgusting. This guy is not 'cute'.

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Bethany1 on Dec 9^th, 2004, 8:26am

[smiley=spit.gif]

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by OneEyeBlind on Dec 9^th, 2004, 8:58am

But when the heck am I suppose to add the politics into the mix ? Lost again for sure !

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Linda_Howell on Dec 9^th, 2004, 11:36am

Aw Teddy, I've missed you.

Charlie hasn't been the same since you've been gone.

Linda ;)

Title: ,Re: I have a new cure
Post by marlin on Dec 9^th, 2004, 11:51am

Uh, so Ted uh... Kasinski, before I ask how much this miracle cure costs, how does it taste? Sounds pretty good. My brother ate a cooked goat's eyeball once at a Kazak ritual, threw up in a napkin and insulted all the local elders so I just want to be sure. Oh, he still got offered the senior grand poobah's daughter whom he turned down after a polite lie of an explanation that he was already engaged.

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Woobie on Dec 9^th, 2004, 12:04pm

HI TED!!!!!!!! ;;D

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Tom K on Dec 9^th, 2004, 12:18pm

Harp seal meat...Check
Liquid Smoke...Check

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Charlie on Dec 9^th, 2004, 2:43pm

You gotta close that fuckin' ebay store Ted. It's going to your head.

Good to see you back so far........ ::)

Charlie http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/gifs/pills.gif

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Melissa on Dec 9^th, 2004, 2:46pm

Ted, good to see you post. I hope you're doing alright and I miss ya...

mel

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Kirk on Dec 9^th, 2004, 4:41pm

Damn and its atleast three months until the seal pups will be handy to club.
[smiley=smokin.gif]

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by WhoIsTedNow on Dec 9^th, 2004, 11:58pm

on 12/09/04 at 08:25:22, john_d wrote:

I remember Ted's last posts, they were disgusting. This guy is not 'cute'.

Snots running down his nose... daa nana na nananana... A-a-a-aqualung...

OK. Now just the men sing.
OK. And now John.

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by cootie on Dec 10^th, 2004, 12:10am

Hey Ted.......dam all the seals migrated to W Virginia....any substitutions ? Seal shit is purdy slimey slick Pam

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by Mr. Happy on Dec 10^th, 2004, 12:13am

on 12/09/04 at 14:43:48, Charlie wrote:

Good to see you back so far

Oi. This won't take long.

Sing, Teddy....
RJ

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by WhoIsTedNow on Dec 10^th, 2004, 12:17am

Naaahhhh. Not long at all, Mr Happy.
Cootie. Bald Eagle works too but it has to be male-pattern bald eagle.

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by ClusterChuck on Dec 10^th, 2004, 12:31am

How about a male pattern bald eagle, that is adicted to viagra? Seems like it would add a little stiffness to the mixture.

Chuck

PS: Glad to see your GREAT sense of humor back here, Ted!

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by cootie on Dec 10^th, 2004, 1:02am

I think there's a bald eagle upstairs asleep.....where's my bat. Badda bing badda bam Pam

Title: Re: I have a new cure
Post by WhoIsTedNow on Dec 10^th, 2004, 1:10am

Let the bald eagle sleep up there. Come on down to the male-pattern part. Badda Bing Badda BOING!