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        New Message Board Archives >> 2004 Posts >> Why I missed the convention
        
(Message started by: fubar on Jul 16^th, 2004, 3:30am)

Title: Why I missed the convention
Post by fubar on Jul 16^th, 2004, 3:30am

I know some people were kind of perplexed that I chose not to go to the convention. I would really like to have gone, really. I had the means to get there, the paid time off available, and yet I still had a strong feeling I shouldn’t go. I blamed it primarily on the prospect of the vomiting that would be induced being around all that cigarette smoke (no joke, I get sick as a dog around it) but deep inside I knew there was something else telling me not to plan a trip.

Well, as luck would have it, I was dead on. What used to be a somewhat stable separation from my wife has turned into a full-scale war in a flash, and all of a sudden I have more responsibilities and work than I ever imagined possible.

See, I was quite happy with our informal arrangement. We own a bar. She is an alcoholic (among other things). When we split, she got the bar since it was her ‘job’. She had been running the bar for a couple years because I got sick of trying to deal with it and her in it at the same time. And, since her priorities were a bit alcohol-soaked, I ended up with the kids and the house. That was fine with me. She spent the last year partying her ass off and diving deeper into addiction and delusion, in and out of mental hospitals and rehab. All the while, she was losing any sense of control of the bar, and bad stuff started happening there. Multiple ‘robberies’ (inside jobs as far as I can tell) and employee theft, drug dealing at the bar, alcohol license violations of the highest order, failure to file basic taxes or pay any bills whatsoever… you get the idea. And guess what, I’m liable for all of that since I technically am still married and I am named on the alcohol license anyway.

Now I am stuck cleaning up this entire mess, and trying to get divorce proceedings and orders giving me solitary control of the business and residence (a comfort I don’t enjoy right now) She can legally make my life hell right now and she is doing an amazing job at it. The best part is she is completely insane right now, and I mean that in the most clinical way. She has no idea what she is saying or talking about most of the time. For example, she called me on my cell phone to scream at me about the fact I changed all of my phone numbers so she couldn’t call me anymore. When I pointed out she had just called the (very old) same number as always, she still argued the point and refused to believe I hadn’t changed my phone numbers. Moral to the story: Meth is bad.

Now, I am dealing with things quite well, and to be honest, the idea of being legally divorced and truly moving on with my life is exciting, not depressing. I know any sane judge will see what is what, and I have nothing to fear in court. I AM NOT LOOKING FOR SYMPATHY. Vibes, well cool, but please please please double please don’t write any oh I feel so sorry for you crap, ok? I just wanted to let my real family know why it was fate that I could not be in Nashville, and it was the right thing for me to stay home. You have no FRIKKIN idea how much I really wanted to be there.

Now, and this is the part where you smokers will die laughing. I said the primary reason I stayed away was the thought of all that smoke. You know we are one hell of a bunch of dragons, and smoke literally makes me almost puke within 10 minutes of being around it. Well, now I am running my bar and it’s the smokiest bar in the whole USA I think. I have to spend at least 2-3 hours there each day, and I am f’ing sick everyday. So, my plan to avoid the smoke has not only been foiled, I’ve been 1000x punished for using that as an excuse to miss a gathering of this incredible bunch of folks. I am there in spirit, I sent a few to represent me. I hope to see all of you next year.

-Shawn

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by pubgirl on Jul 16^th, 2004, 3:54am

OK Shawn

No sympathy from me.

Just get yourself an army surplus gasmask and stop whining ;;D

Wendy

oh, and hope you sort the silly cow out soon ;)

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Superpain on Jul 16^th, 2004, 4:00am

Sux dude...
You are correct... Meth is worse than bad!
Better take control and start kickin ass and takin names if it's YOUR liquor license!

Don't want to lose that puppy! :o

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by purpleydog on Jul 16^th, 2004, 4:35am

I hope everything goes your way, Shawn. I don't smoke and it is a major trigger for me in cycle. Like now.
Good Luck!

purpleydog

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Donna_D. on Jul 16^th, 2004, 4:45am

Hey Fu...

The Main Hangout is the open air front porch of the bar. There is a steady breeze....

Might do you some good to be around people who love and care about you....

It's well needed....Just think about it...what is one day?

DD

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Becky on Jul 16^th, 2004, 10:01am

(((((Fubar))))),

Kick some ass, and get her. I am sorry I won't get to meet you. Get this all taken care of and I will see you next year.

Hugz

Bec

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Margi on Jul 16^th, 2004, 10:12am

Well, Shawn, this really does stink that life has dealt you this hand. (See? I didn't say 'sorry', even though it took every ounce of willpower I have to avoid that word - I hope you're suitably impressed ;)).

I have no doubt that you will sail through this with flying colours and emerge the victor here. Your kids are blessed to have a dad like you.

Any chance you can sell the bar and sever all ties there?

Don't forget, as you're climbing this mountain in front of you, to stop and look behind you to see how far you've already come, ok? Don't dwell on how far you've got to go. You'll get there.

Here's to a great new life for you, Shawn! You've definitely earned it!

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Jonny on Jul 16^th, 2004, 10:37am

FU Dude,

I got one thing to say.....

NEXT YEAR WILL ROCK WITH YOU HERE!!!!

Kick that bitch to the curb and focus on next year with the family.....We aint going anywhere....We will always be a flight away, Bro

....................................jonny

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by CarrieBethRN on Jul 16^th, 2004, 11:05am

Hey Fu,

I sure will miss getting to meet you!!! But, you gotta do what you gotta do. I am sending MEGA vibes for you to wade thru all the crap you've got on your hands! If you need ANYTHING, there's many people here waiting and ready to help. :) Oh and like somebody else said, have a great time with your new life!! Sometimes a new start is a good thing.

Hugz,
Carrie :)

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Tiannia on Jul 16^th, 2004, 11:24am

Go for it Fu. Kick her ass and make her deal witht he consiquences that she has laid our for herself.

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by don on Jul 16^th, 2004, 11:57am

Sell the liquor liscense and turn the place into a nice smoke free hot dog stand. That will eliminate the smoke.

I have worked in the addiction field for many years and have yet to encounter anyone with a hot dog addiction. That should elimate the employee thefts.

I have never seen any newspaper article involving illicit hot dog dealing. That elimates the unsavory element.

I would imagine you have to work at it to violate a hot dog vendors liscense. Good bye license violations.

Your on your own with the IRS.

Do what you want with the ex-wife.

I'll have two to go with mustard and onions.

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Jimmy_B on Jul 16^th, 2004, 12:18pm

on 07/16/04 at 11:57:32, don wrote:

I have worked in the addiction field for many years and have yet to encounter anyone with a hot dog addiction.
I have never seen any newspaper article involving illicit hot dog dealing.

I'll have two to go with mustard and onions.

If they made them illegal...you'd see me taking to the mean streets, trying to score a Hebrew National...or maybe even the good stuff a BallPark Frank. ummm HotDogs.

Jimmy

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Redd715 on Jul 16^th, 2004, 12:37pm

on 07/16/04 at 11:57:32, don wrote:

Don you should have quit while the quitting was good....LMAO!!! No problems with selling hotdogs? Think again and read this!!

http://www.wisinfo.com/postcrescent/news/archive/local_16925318.shtml

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by SFChris on Jul 16^th, 2004, 12:54pm

Shawn - we haven't hung out in awhile. If you want, give me a call and we can have our own NorCal covention. We can party in SanFran, and send vibes to all in Tennesse.

Be well friend.

Chris

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Root on Jul 16^th, 2004, 4:53pm

Don has the right idea.

I'll take three smoked Brats covered with Chili Con Quesa and Onions. [smiley=smokin.gif]

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by ave on Jul 16^th, 2004, 5:03pm

Tell you what, fu;

seems you now have THE best place to hold a regional clustermeet.

How 'bout it?

(O, yeah my... what is it, not sympathy, not commiserations... vibes, that's what. Here's some.)

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by don on Jul 16^th, 2004, 6:09pm

Quote:

Police Chief Richard Myers praised Edgerton for being a good and decent businessman, but said his presence on the avenue at bar closing encouraged intoxicated bar patrons to remain downtown, fostering fights and other illegal behavior.

LMMFAO ! Irresponsible drunks and bar owners have nothing to do with it. It's that felonious fucking hot dog vendor. LMAO Get rid of him and there will be peace in the valley. If the guy was selling burgers to it would be a regular fucking crime wave!

Forget everything I said FU. Dont want to lead you down path of crime. Scared straight.

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by John_D on Jul 16^th, 2004, 6:23pm

fubar, sounds like you have the same taste in women I do ;;D just kidding, but I have been round and round with some real winners. Oh well, what can you do, attraction to unhealthy women is a curse right behind clusters themselves :P

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by 9erfan on Jul 16^th, 2004, 7:28pm

OK Fu, no sympathy from me. But you know you've got my support. Now...kick her to the curb!

What's up with a bar in Cali where smoking is allowed? I thought those didn't exist! I would be getting sick every night as well my friend. I can totally relate! :-[

Take care of yourself. We need to get together soon when things settle down, ok?

Love,
V.

Title: Re: Why I missed the convention
Post by Melissa on Jul 16^th, 2004, 7:29pm

Californians are such whinners....

(Linda here on Melissa's lap-top)

Dude....ya done the right thing. :-* [smiley=smokin.gif] [smiley=smokin.gif]

Did I just say dude????? omg, I need to go to the home for the emotionally insane.

Linda