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        New Message Board Archives >> 2004 Posts >> How to make your computer secure in 4 easy steps
        
(Message started by: ExplodingEyeBall on Jul 1st, 2004, 3:41pm)
Title: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy steps
Post by ExplodingEyeBall on Jul 1st, 2004, 3:41pm
ALL computers are subject to problems from virii/worms/trojans etc...

Here are the 4 easy steps to make your computer completely secure and free of problems no matter what operating system you use.


1. Disconnect your telephone line or network cable.

2. Turn it off and disconnect the power cable.

3. Put it back in the box it came in.

4. Lock it in a safe.

There you go. Now your problems are solved.

Pat
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by jhammer on Jul 1st, 2004, 3:47pm
The only sure way   :D
Title: 2 easy steps
Post by floridian on Jul 1st, 2004, 3:52pm
Starting with an uninfected computer:

1) Establish an Air-Gap Interface (disconnect the network cable or modem).
2) only install software from a source you trust.

This approach is slightly less secure than EEB's idea, but the computer is a lot more usable.  Is it a computer if it never computes??
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by ExplodingEyeBall on Jul 1st, 2004, 3:53pm
If man makes a statement in the woods and there's no woman around to hear it......Is he still wrong?
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by floridian on Jul 1st, 2004, 3:54pm
I'm not the one to ask  ;)
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by Melissa on Jul 1st, 2004, 4:02pm

on 07/01/04 at 15:53:41, ExplodingEyeBall wrote:
If man makes a statement in the woods and there's no woman around to hear it......Is he still wrong?


yes.
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by Opus on Jul 1st, 2004, 4:08pm
Those aren't even close to secure.

1. Remove everything on the hard drive except your data.

2. Remove all cables from the computer, and remove any Wifi cards.

3. Place case in box, use pieces of metal to raise it off the floor of the box.

4. Pour concrete in box, making sure it flows under the case, let cure for 72 days.

That is a secure computer.

Opus/Paul
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by ExplodingEyeBall on Jul 1st, 2004, 4:50pm
Opus... I admit defeat here. Your method is definitely more secure than mine.

I guess that nix guys and M$ guys can see eye to eye once in a while.
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by purpleydog on Jul 1st, 2004, 5:44pm

on 07/01/04 at 15:53:41, ExplodingEyeBall wrote:
If man makes a statement in the woods and there's no woman around to hear it......Is he still wrong?


you're kidding right?   [smiley=laugh.gif]


purpleydog
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by alleyoop49 on Jul 1st, 2004, 7:11pm

on 07/01/04 at 16:08:41, Opus wrote:
Those aren't even close to secure.

1. Remove everything on the hard drive except your data.

2. Remove all cables from the computer, and remove any Wifi cards.

3. Place case in box, use pieces of metal to raise it off the floor of the box.

4. Pour concrete in box, making sure it flows under the case, let cure for 72 days.

That is a secure computer.

Opus/Paul


Yea, but boot time is a bitch!
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by Opus on Jul 1st, 2004, 7:43pm
Pat,
  Any OS can be taken over, infected or wiped. The reports are still vague but it seems some Linux distro which runs in root with the firewall turned off by default is being turned into spambots. This doesn't sound like Lindowsspire does it? The biggest security risk is between the keyboard and chair, not just what they chose to run but how they choose to run it. With high security turned on, and all services turned off by default the security risk is lowered by default. I'm sure we also agree on this point

Opus/Paul
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by Opus on Jul 1st, 2004, 7:47pm

on 07/01/04 at 19:11:18, alleyoop49 wrote:
Yea, but boot time is a bitch!



Nobody said it was usable but it certainly is secure, even a box not on a network can be compromised by someone breaking into the house, any password can be found, any encryption broken, nothing is safe.

Opus/Paul
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by jonny on Jul 1st, 2004, 9:53pm
Kill them...Kill them all!!!! ;;D

..................................jonny
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by Jeepgun on Jul 2nd, 2004, 1:02pm
Three easy steps to solve your computer aggravation:

1. Pick up sledgehammer.
2. Apply sledgehammer repeatedly to computer.
3. Drink a beer and bask in the feeling of a job well done.
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by Drk^Angel on Jul 3rd, 2004, 9:04pm
Dammit... Jeep took my answer...  Except he forgot to soak in in gasoline and torch it...

PFDAN............................. Drk^Angel
Title: Re: How to make your computer secure in 4 easy ste
Post by ClusterChuck on Jul 3rd, 2004, 9:09pm

on 07/01/04 at 16:02:26, Melissa wrote:
yes.


Typical female answer!  Sheesh!!!!

Chuck

PS: Ducking and hiding now.


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