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        New Message Board Archives >> 2002-2004 Funnies and Jokes >> For the Hormone Hostage
        
(Message started by: kimh on Nov 20^th, 2004, 6:34pm)

Title: For the Hormone Hostage
Post by kimh on Nov 20^th, 2004, 6:34pm

THE HORMONE WARNING:

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man
has to do is open his mouth and he takes his
life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a
driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant
other!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?

ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!

ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.

ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?

ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!

ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate.

13 Things PMS Stands For
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
And my favourite one...
13. Potential Murder Suspect